The Melancholy of Selphie Tilmitt
by TokyoJunk
Summary: “I am the center of the universe,” Selphie declared on the roof top of our school one afternoon. I didn’t know whether to laugh or be horrified. Post KHII. Crack.
1. Episode 1: The Melancholy of Selphie

**note:** I'm starting the new year with a multi-chapter fic. Oh boy. May god help me.

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**Episode 1: The Melancholy of Selphie Tilmitt

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It all started with a simple declaration.

"I am the center of the universe."

And from there on out, my life was changed.

But lets back up for a second and let me introduce myself. My name is Riku. No, I don't have a last name, you can go ahead and triple check that game booklet of yours, and yes, if push comes to shove the giant heads at Square Enix will gift me with a half-assed Japanese last name if need be. Not that I wouldn't mind having a last name, but not having one has its perks. It makes it harder for people to find my number in the yellow pages, but I digress.

Let's take a moment here to analyze the statement my dear friend Selphie Tilmitt has said above.

"I am the center of the universe."

Now when one reads this, the first thought that comes to mind is "Wow, aren't you a special little snow flake," but snark aside, it is physically impossible for a single human being to be the driving cosmic force of an entire universe made up of hundreds of planets, thousands of stars, and millions of gateways to alternate universes that harbor billions of ridiculously inaccurate plot holes (trust me, those things _do_ exist, after all, I'm in one).

So when Selphie made this declaration on the roof top of our school one afternoon, I didn't know whether to laugh or be horrified.

"The safety of this universe heavily relies on the stability of my happiness."

I went with the latter and recoiled in fear.

I looked at the rest of my friends who were dragged up here with me. Tidus blinked a couple of times, making sure his eyes believed what his ears just heard. Wakka didn't say anything. He was busy trying not to look down despite not being near the edge of the five story building (his unfortunate fear of heights will be something Selphie will exploit later on, I'm sure). Sora looked confused as he chewed on his bottom lip in thought and tilted his head to the side. Kairi seemed the most sympathetic as she walked up to the perky brunette and smiled.

"Selphie, are you feeling okay?" she asked, placing her hands on the top of Selphie's shoulders.

Good, I wasn't the only one who thought that Selphie was a little on the bonkers side. But Selphie didn't think so. In fact, she scrunched up her face and pouted her lips.

"What do you mean if I feel okay?" She took a step back, letting Kairi's hands slip off her shoulders. "I feel fine!"

Cue cute bounce and hello kitty pose number six. While everyone was distracted, or more apparently, gawked, I slowly inched my way backwards towards the exit.

"So let me get this straight," Tidus piped up after his comatose state. The way he was scratching the back of his head looked as though he was trying really hard to figure this thing out. "You're the center of the universe, and the universe's safety solely relies on how happy you are?"

"Pretty much." Selphie didn't even flinch when she said that.

"That's bullshit!"

"Language!" Selphie threatened, a finger pointing at Tidus' lips. "It's completely plausible, you know. It's been scientifically proven over the past few months."

Tidus raised an eyebrow, looking more skeptical than curious.

"How?"

"Well, remember that thunderstorm a while back that knocked out the power for about a week?" Selphie pointed to herself as she leaned in closer to Tidus in an almost confrontational stance. "That was me. It happened after I stubbed my toe and cursed up a storm in rage."

Tidus frowned.

"It's hurricane season, hectic storms like that tend to happen," he said, clearly not buying into her excuse.

Which was true, but lately the island has been hit with an unusual amount of tropical rain storms. It's a miracle that everything isn't underwater yet.

"Can we talk about this somewhere else? I think I'm feeling a bit lightheaded, ya?"

"What about that earthquake two months back?" she asked, ignoring Wakka, who at moment was sweating bullets. "That was me too!"

"That was a dormant volcano waking up, it was on the news."

This was also true, only as soon as scientists went to study the volcano on location; they discovered that the mountain went back to being dormant.

"The point is," she said, stopping Tidus from speaking any further by placing her face mere inches away from his face. "That any change in my mood can prove to be catastrophic to this world."

Selphie stepped back from Tidus' personal space bubble.

"Who's to say what will happen when I really blow a fuse?" She grabbed Tidus' tie and pulled him close, bringing him eye to eye level. "The world implodes? The universe explodes?" Then she started violently shaking him. "I can't afford for that to happen! I have to see who Tyra chooses in the next cycle of America's Next Top Model!"

Selphie was really going for the hysterics here. But I didn't say anything. In fact, I doubt anyone knows I'm there. I'm just a silent innocent by standard…or a ninja.

Anyway, I doubt anyone else cares that I'm slowly, but surely making my way towards the exit.

Tidus pulled himself free, hands working effortlessly at smoothing out his ruffled shirt and blue plaid tie.

"So you're the center of the universe, big deal. Still doesn't mean anything." He crossed his arms over his chest as if to prove he was angry. "You still suck at sparring." He scowled.

"Jealously will get you no where Tidus," Selphie chimed, "Jealously will get. You. No. Where."

"I think I'm going to be sick, ya." Wakka didn't look so good, what with his drunken swaying and all.

"I should take Wakka to the nurse." Kairi looked at Wakka worriedly. She quickly went to his side when he looked like he was about to faint.

"And how did you reach this conclusion anyway?" Tidus questioned, completely ignoring the fact that his best friend was turning a nice shade of green. "It's not like you woke up one day and decided that today was the day you were going to be the center of the universe."

I was only a foot away from the door. A little more and sweet succulent freedom would be mine!

"Thanks to Riku, I was able to figure things out."

I stood there, stiff as a board, as everyone turned around from a smiling Selphie and blared their cold hard gazes onto me. They were looks that spoke volumes, from "what the hell have you done!" from Tidus, to the "you should know better than to make careless comments around Selphie" from Kairi. Sora just looked very disappointed at me while Wakka was the only one I couldn't read because he just looked dizzy.

I felt my shoulders slump like a little boy being sent to his room without dessert.

I sighed.

I know I didn't directly tell her that she was the center of the universe, but I can see how what I have said may have influenced her way of thinking.

* * *

It all started about a couple of months ago. I sit in front of Selphie in our classroom.

A quick explanation as to why I'm in the same class as Sora, Kairi, and Selphie. I was held back a year after my journey of saving the worlds with Sora. I knew I was capable of passing the placement exam to go to my appropriate grade level, but I found it too troublesome to even bother. Did I mention that I am as lazy as I am roguishly handsome?

Moving on.

I walked into class one day and saw Selphie staring blankly out the window. I was alarmed. Selphie Tilmitt was sitting at her desk staring vacantly out the window instead of moving about the room, mixing her aggressively perky self into other people's conversations.

I approached my desk warily and sat down.

I waited for her to strike up a conversation with me, but it never came. So when five minutes went by and I couldn't take her eerie silence anymore, I slowly turned around and with a causal air about me, asked her what was wrong.

"I'm bored." She responded. Her gaze never left the window, which worried me. I shifted in my seat a little to turn and face her completely.

"But you're Selphie."

"Yeah. So?" She turned to finally look at me and I swear I probably made a choking sound on the spot. Selphie has these very intense green eyes that sparkle when she's happy, but take on a wild forest green color when she's somber. At the moment I was staring into a jungle like forest and quickly losing myself in its thick foliage. I averted my eyes towards my fellow students, the ones still mingling about before our homeroom teacher came in to do roll call.

"You're never bored." I said offhandedly. I leaned back a little, slouching a bit into my seat.

"Well guess what? I'm bored." She frowned and turned to look out the window again.

It was disheartening to see Selphie this calm. So I straightened up and thought about her situation. We may not be as close friends as she was with Kairi, but we were still friends, and as a friend I should at least try to think of a solution for her.

"Then why don't you try out for a club?" I finally conjured after a minute of thinking. Getting her involved in an activity after school could probably cure her of her boredom.

Thinking back on it now, I wish I'd gone back in time and beat my past self senseless. Friends my ass, my careless advice would soon bite me later in the butt. But I'm getting ahead of the plot.

So over the next month, Selphie tried out for every single club in the school. One would think a person would eventually find their niche after trying out all of the combined twenty eight clubs, teams, and committees in our school. But Selphie barely lasted beyond a day without bouncing to another group. Turns out she was either too abrasive when it came to running clubs, too competitive for sports teams, or too assertive for committees.

The day when she finally gave up, Selphie sat alone in our classroom. I'd just come from changing out of my gym clothes and told Sora to wait for me while I went to get my book bag. I didn't expect to see Selphie sitting at her desk in the empty classroom. But there she was, still dressed in her gym uniform, staring out the window.

Besides noticing that she was alone and still dressed in her gym clothes, I noticed that she had her hair up in a pony tail. It wasn't anything unique, lots of girls wear their hair up, but it was different from the usual hair flip I was used to seeing.

"Looks good," I said, taking a seat at my desk.

She turned from her window watching and glared at me. She used her forest green eyes again.

"I mean your hair. When it's up like that, it looks good."

And it did. I've always had a thing for girls with pony tails. But Selphie didn't seem to appreciate the complement because she glared at me even harder. Is that even possible?

Anyway, she rolled her eyes at me and shook her head as if saying "Stop. You just don't get me" and went back to staring out the window again.

I sighed and slouched in my seat with my back against the short wall and window. I leaned my head back, mind racing with possible remedies that wouldn't get me maimed or killed on the spot. I turned slightly to look at her and saw that her frowning forehead, the small pout, and vacant eyes didn't really communicate that she was angry. She looked more upset, more hurt. Can it be possible that the ever perky Selphie Tilmitt is susceptible to a little bit of unhappiness in her life? Maybe she's always been this unhappy and we never bothered to notice. Maybe she forces herself to smile and say that everything is alright even though she's hurting. It could be, that at the moment, she's too tired to keep up her happy persona seeing as she was probably rejected by the majority of the teams and clubs she's tried out for.

But that couldn't be. This was Selphie Tilmitt here. She was the girl in the yellow dress that lived down the street from me. She was the girl that dreamed big, and truly believed that her prince charming was out there somewhere, waiting to whisk her away on his magical unicorn or something.

I sat up and thought.

Is there something more to her? Is Selphie Tilmitt capable of having layers to her personality?

The silence between us was making me feel sort of awkward and it didn't help that the room was beginning to feel stuffy.

"How's the club search?" I asked, hoping that the question would open up some conversation. "Find something you like doing?"

"No," was her tart reply.

"Really?" I turned around in my seat and faced her.

"Did you try for the tennis team?"

Cue murderous glare. How unfortunate that I didn't burst into flames.

"So I'll take a wild guess and say things didn't go so well."

"All these clubs are stupid." She spat. "There's nothing unique or fun about them. They're just clones of clubs all high schools in the entire universe have."

My left eyebrow twitched. They were high school clubs. What was she expecting them to be? Mafia controlled Mile high clubs?

"Why don't you make up your own if you're so picky?"

And that's the point folks, where I wish I bit my tongue and bled to death. Who knew that such a reply would lead to a world of chaos and destruction at the hands of little miss sunshine? But of course at the time, I didn't know I was foolishly playing with the lid to Pandora's Box.

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A week or so later, Selphie gave me a rude awakening.

It actually happened today. I, being a serious and studious student, was spacing out during Japanese History when all of a sudden someone from behind yanked my hair, sending my head backwards to collide with the hard wooden surface of a desk.

"I got it!"

The entire class turned to gape at Selphie as she posed.

I, on the other hand, shot up once the numb sensation at the back of my skull began to throb with pain.

"What the hell Selphie! You can't just go around slamming people's heads onto your desk!" I growled.

"Oh, quit complaining you big baby. The important thing is that I got it!" She slammed her fist on her desk for emphasis. "It finally came to me!"

I looked around the classroom and saw people either whispering to each other or snickering. I turned to look at our teacher and almost winced when I saw the man's heavy frown.

"Miss Tilmitt, can your epiphany wait until after class? I would like to get through the Tokugawa period without further outbursts."

Well that seemed to cool things down. The entire class went militant as they sat up straight and paid attention under our History teacher's glare. Selphie was the only one unfazed by him as she plopped herself down and leaned forward into my ear.

"Meet me on the school roof today at four."

And that brings my story up to now. It didn't help that I took another step back to get closer to the door as everyone glared.

"You know, in my defense," I started, raising my hands in surrender. "I want to say that I was on medication on that day, so my words may have been slurred and taken out of context."

Tidus rolled his eyes and turned to look at Selphie.

"So you dragged us up here to say that you're the center of the universe?"

"Not quite," Selphie began and walked over to the edge of the building. "I've always known that I was the center of the universe, I was just too modest to say anything about it." She shrugged.

"But lately, I've been feeling kind of down. So over the past month in a half I've been trying out for the clubs and teams to remedy my unhappiness. But none of them seemed right enough for me."

She turned around to look at us.

"The other day, when I was finally going to give up after being rejected from yet _another_ team, Riku gave me my answer. And so I've decided to start my own club."

"So you dragged us up here for that!?"

Selphie smiled.

"Wow Tidus, you're pretty sharp today."

Tidus let out an exasperated sigh.

"I can't believe this," he said, shaking his head and walking up to Wakka. The redhead was transferred from Kairi's embrace to lean on his blonde friend for support.

"I'm out of here. I'm not wasting my time."

It would have been a dramatic exit, only Wakka chose to dramatically puke all over Tidus.

Ew.

"Damn it Wakka!"

"So, what's your club going to be about?" Kairi asked, trying not to pay attention at the spectacle going on behind me. If she really wanted to help she could have just gone after Tidus and Wakka. What's stopping her?

"The club is about me."

"A Selphie club?" Sora finally asked. Good, for a second I thought he was just blending into the background.

"Yup. We need to spread Selphie awareness and this club will do the trick."

How can she think that is the solution to her problem? I know I told her to make up her own club, but I didn't imply that it had to be all about her.

"So, do you guys want to help me?"

"Well you can count me out," I said out right. She was ridiculous to think I would want to participate in her egotistical shenanigans. But she didn't seem hurt by my quick answer; instead she turned to Kairi and smiled.

"Kairi?"

Kairi looked from Selphie to the exit and then back to Selphie.

"If this is what you truly want," she chewed on her bottom lip. "Then I guess I don't mind."

Of course she doesn't mind. She's Selphie's default best friend.

Selphie turned her gaze to Sora now and I felt my lips curve in a smirk. Sora would never fall for it. Only Sora nodded rigorously and smiled.

I frowned. Et tu Sora? Talk about being stabbed in the back.

"Yay! The only one being a prude here is Riku!"

I couldn't believe Sora was cheering along with her. I grabbed my best friend by the arm and pulled him aside while Selphie began to talk Kairi's ears to death.

"You're actually going on with this?" I tried to sound serious, but I couldn't hide my disappointed tone.

Sora pulled himself free from my grasp.

"Why not?"

"Because it's stupid and her claim at being connected to the universe is humanly impossible."

"Riku, we've traveled through worlds, fought millions of heartless and, managed to take down an organization bent on destroying everything in sight. I don't know if Selphie's claim is true or not, but it doesn't surprise me compared to all the weird things I've seen."

I rubbed my temples, trying to sooth the monster headache that was forming within the walls of my skull.

"So you're going on board with this, no matter how stupid it sounds?"

Sora crossed his arms and nodded with determination.

"Compared to Xemnas, Selphie should be a walk in the park."

And since I'm his default best friend I'm inclined to join. I sighed again for the second time today.

"Fine, if you're doing it, I might as well." I reluctantly said. But if things get too weird, Sora or not, I'm out of there.

Sora shrugged and watched as Selphie elaborately illustrated to Kairi her club's dance routine that members were required to learn.

"You never know, it might be fun." Sora chuckled and went to the perky brunette who quickly began to show him the steps.

If you equate being covered in honey and rolling around on a bed of red fire ants, then sure, this was going to be a riot.

"Come on Riku, you try!"

Selphie pulled me forward and soon afterwards, I was made into her dancing puppet. Sora seemed very amused as he clapped and cheered, while Kairi shyly smiled at my misery.

I could only hang my head in shame.

Why me?

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**note:** so...um...yeah, total rip off of The Melancholy of Haruhi...but it was fun to write. There's more of this monstrosity to come.


	2. Episode 2: Let’s get started

**note: **I'm glad people are enjoying this and are asking questions! Here's this week's episode.

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**Episode 2: Let's get started**

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Now, when Selphie gets an idea, she usually makes it happen come hell or high water. So it didn't surprise me when she didn't wait for the lunch bell to ring to physically haul me out of math class by my tie.

"I need your help."

And that was all it took for me to look at her at that moment before complaining about her almost choking me to death with my own tie. It was hard to believe that the little person in front of me was the center of the universe. I mean, Selphie Tilmitt couldn't be that powerful. I should know, I've fought countless of heartless, monsters, and Xemnas in his oh so many fashionable forms. But when I really looked at her, when I really examined her beyond the flipped up hair, the mischievous smirk, and those fiery emerald eyes, I saw something.

I saw something hidden beneath the underneath, crying to be let out. It was difficult to tell if it was raw determination or pure loneliness, but it was there. It was bubbling inside of her, frothing at the edges and waiting to spill out.

I took a deep breath, exhaling through my nose as I felt my stubborn wall of emotion crumble with guilt.

"What do you need for the club?" I asked with sunken shoulders and frowning lips.

Selphie placed her hands on her hips and smiled.

"Well, I need you to take care of the technicalities, the paper work, who we have to bribe, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera."

My left eyebrow twitched. That's basically _all_ the work.

"And what does that leave you to do?"

I crossed my arms over my chest and gave her a heated glare. Not that she would spontaneously combust on the spot, giving me the chance of running for my life screaming in the opposite direction through the hallways.

"I'm going to find our club room of course! What's a club without its room?"

Okay, question: How was she going to do that if we haven't made the club yet?

"We'll meet after school and see what we have, got it?"

I opened my mouth to say something, but had no choice to stop my words in their tracks as she zipped past me. I looked down the hallway and saw the trail of dust and papers mingling in the air as students picked themselves up from the floor in a daze and confused state.

"What the hell was that?!"

"I don't know, it just looked like a blur to me," a female student said, shrugging.

I rubbed my temples as further inquiry about the blur buzzed around the hallway.

Today was not a good day.

* * *

"So, what do you want to know?"

I decided that the best person to ask about making a club was Sora. He was a member of the student government which worked closely with the student board of activities from time to time.

"I need to know how to start a club."

Sora chewed on his straw for a minute as he thought.

Ever since coming home from our epic journey, our dangerous and unpredictable lives have been swapped out for the mundane routine of everyday life. It took me a while to learn to adjust. Just the other day I found that not everyone is out to get me, so summoning my keyblade on that fragile old woman holding a bag of oranges in the supermarket was not exactly necessary.

I thought Sora would have a tougher time than me, since he was the keyblade wilder (only by default, I was perfectly willing and able to do the job. I was just side tracked by the darkness). I thought he'd be the type that would get detention for sleeping or drooling over his notes during class over daydreaming. But he proved me wrong. Sora jumped right into school life, all thanks to Kairi, who was equally if not more involved in school with her being on the honor roll. He became a member of the student government, worked hard to earn good grades, and was popular enough to have his own fan club of both girls _and_ boys.

I wonder if Sora would drop it all at the mention of going on another adventure. I know I would. But he just seems so engrossed by the current world around him, am I the only one looking for a little change to my routine?

You must be thinking, 'well there's that club that Selphie is going to start'. You're right. That is a step towards change. But it's not the change that I'm looking for. I want something bigger than that, I want something epic, I want something out of this world, no, out of this universe that leaves my old journey in the dust in its greatness.

I didn't realize how hard I was squeezing my own juice box when I was thinking of Riku's Epic Journey part deux. But Sora was kind enough to point out the red juice stain on my shirt. I tried dabbing the stain with a napkin, but it was to no avail. Looks like I'm going to go around the rest of the day with a red juice hickey on my shirt.

"Well, if Selphie is serious about this club of hers," Sora started, "She's going to have to fill out the necessary paper work."

"Which entails?"

"The name of the club, a teacher who's willing to sign off on it as an adviser, and a room."

Well that explains Selphie's burning urge to get the club a home. But why didn't she just do the rest herself? Getting a teacher would be easy; all she had to do was blackmail them into doing it.

"What else is involved?"

Sora took a bite out of his tuna sandwich, chewing a bit before answering my question.

"A club has to have a minimum of five members in order to be active," he said, "Also; a new club is on probation for the first two weeks to see if membership declines."

I snorted. That won't be hard. Selphie will probably drag some poor soul out of the hallway to join her cult. If given the power, Selphie might even be able to raise an army.

Cue shudder and mental image of me being in therapy for the next year.

"But a club has to be more than just a place where people hang out," Sora said, balling up the peeled off scraps of crust of his sandwich. "It has to have a purpose beyond bringing people with the same interests together. A club has to affect the lives of the students or the community as a whole in a positive manner."

"So in other words, each club has to do community service?"

Sora nodded. "In a way, I guess." He stood up and gathered all his garbage. I followed him towards the trash bin. "The student body and community do benefit from club activities. Look at the computer club, they help set up most of the computers in the school and offer free tech support on Fridays for anyone having issues with their laptops."

I chewed on my bottom lip for a bit. What can a club purely centered on Selphie have to offer to the student body and community? The only actions that come to my mind were death and destruction, and that's the optimistic side of me thinking. I would hate to go over to the dark-side.

Ha. Dark-side.

Anyway, before I was so distracted by the gifted power of irony, I turned to Sora.

"Thanks for telling what I needed to know."

Sora shrugged.

"Sure. I mean, it's all in your student manual if you bothered to look, but asking me is fine."

"You memorized the entire book?"

I saw Sora's lips immediately draw into a pout. "It helps me sleep at night," he said, defensively. I didn't know whether to wince or look horrified that my best friend had no life.

Note to self: kidnap Sora, plan another trip to visit the worlds (even if it kills me), and get Sora back to indiscriminately killing things that are dark that twitch.

"Listen, once I help Selphie get started and she pulls another poor soul to take over my henchmen duties, let's go to the island to spar."

"Can't," Sora gathered whatever folders he had before sitting to eat lunch with me and straightened up his tie. "The student government is planning a mock United Nations trial. You should come. I'm representing Russia and I'm going to try to invade Greenland."

I felt my shoulders tense at the cringing idea of foreign leaders falling one by one to Sora's incredibly innocent smile.

"I think I'll pass."

"You don't know what you're missing."

This is where I smile and nod because Sora is acting a bit too creepy for my tastes.

Note to self: scratch the first note, and just chloroform the boy and take him world hopping with me. I don't think it's healthy that Sora should sound so excited about forcibly taking over another country and depriving its people of their pride and land.

* * *

Getting a teacher to sign off as our advisor for the club was difficult. Apparently, Selphie had a reputation among the staff of our school. Every teacher I visited either screamed in horror and locked themselves in their office or bombarded me with questions pertaining to their personal lives. The only person who didn't seem to fear Selphie was our Japanese history teacher, Mr. Hijikata. He simply signed the notice and slammed the door in my face.

The only thing left to fill out was the name of the club, its purpose, and the names of the people starting it.

By the end of the day, Selphie hauled me yet again to a disclosed area on campus. When I regained some type of bodily control of myself, I showed her what I had so far on the form.

"We're short one club name, a purpose, and a member."

Selphie grabbed onto my arm.

"Oh, that's easy stuff! Come on, I have to show you our new club room!"

And I was yet again deprived of the use of my body when she pulled me by the collar. I swear anyone looking in on us might think Selphie was some wild cave woman from the way she was dragging me.

"Since the tech, science, and culinary clubs are in the science building, and the sports clubs and teams are held in the gym building, our club gets lumped in with the left over clubs in the old school building that's also the art building."

I frowned. Great, not only are we in the art building, which has its own share of crazies who probably sleep there trying to make art out of an egg carton and paint, it's also the farthest building from the main building on campus. That means I'll have to use the rear exit of campus when I go home, thus making the fifteen minute walk home twice as long. Looks like I'm going to invest some munny for a bike.

We arrived at a door decorated with signs and pictures of needle work and yarn.

"Isn't this the knitting club's room?" I asked, dusting myself off.

Selphie promptly ripped all the signs and pictures off the door.

"Not anymore!" She threw the ripped up paper to the side. "The seniors involved in the club graduated so there's no one left to revive the club. Isn't that wonderful?"

She slammed open the door, the loud bang making me wince. Inside looked like any other club room, with a window at the end of it, a coat rack, a locker on the side, and a small table and some chairs in the center. What I didn't expect seeing already in there was a girl sitting by the window knitting. Wait? Are those bunny ears on her head?

"How exactly did you get this room?" I asked following Selphie in. "I haven't even submitted the paper work in yet."

She placed her school bag on the table.

"Well, Kairi pulled some strings to find out which clubs were on the list of being canceled. This was first on the list, so I found the room immediately."

"Selphie this isn't fair, you haven't even submitted the paper work to say you even have a club."

She walked past me to close the door.

"And you can't possibly think it's fair to take the knitting club's room."

"Why the hell not?" She swerved around and looked at me, eyes dark with annoyance.

Wait, was she blind? How can she not see the bunny girl knitting quietly at the corner near the window?

"She's why," I said pointing to the girl. I tried not to stare at the girl's bunny ears perched at the top of her head, but it was hard not to. "She's a member of the knitting club. What if she's waiting for more members to join? Doesn't her club have two weeks to get enough members before it's canceled?"

Selphie rolled her eyes and walked past me towards the girl. She stood in front of her, snapping her fingers at her, but the girl didn't respond. She just kept on knitting.

"I asked her if she minded," Selphie said, placing a hand on her hip and studying the girl in front of her. "And as long as she has a place to keep knitting she's fine. She didn't really put up much of a fight for the room either."

Great, now we have a pet along with a stolen club room.

"We still have a problem," I said, reaching into my school bag and taking out the club form. "You need to name this club, make up its objective, and find the minimum amount of members in order to get started."

I stopped myself from saying anything else. Why was I pressing this issue so much? Why did I care? I know Sora, Kairi, and I agreed to get her started, but beyond that Selphie was in control. She was in charge of replacing us with new members as soon as her club was official. So why was I so concerned with her anyway? Could it be that deep own in the frozen depths of this thing called a heart I actually wanted to be there? No. That isn't possible. The reason why I'm pressing the issue is because I want Selphie out of my hair for once this week.

So why wasn't I trying to escape now, leaving the bunny girl at the corner knitting to be Selphie's next slave?

"Wait here. I'll solve the member issue right now," Selphie said, bolting to the door and leaving me alone with the quiet girl by the window.

Maybe she'll find the people who'll replace Sora, Kairi, and me.

I set my school bag down on the table and approached the unusual looking girl by the window slowly. From her distinct snow white hair, stiff white bunny ears, cinnamon red eyes and chocolate brown skin she looked to be…Oh god no.

A Mary Sue?

I stopped short from almost knocking into her and stepped back some paces until my butt touched the end of the long table.

"So, um…what's your name?"

The girl stopped knitting and looked up at me, her blood red eyes looked dull of any life, and her small mouth seemed content with its non-smiling form.

"Fran." She answered.

I sat on the edge of the table. Fran? And here I thought she was going to have some random elaborate name that ended with -chan.

I cleared my throat, uncomfortable with the intensity of her lifeless stare.

"I'm Riku, by the way."

She nodded slowly, as if processing my name and its two syllables into the memory bank of her mind, and went back to knitting.

I swallowed. Her very non-Mary Sue behavior was beginning to worry me. Why wasn't she sparkling me to death with magical glitter? Why wasn't she talking a mile a minute about the tragic life she led and the treacherous people that ruled it?

She must have some type of magical powers or a secret that she's not willing to tell unless a handsome hero (me) capable of saving her from herself questions her and falls deeply in love with her in the process. I swallowed thickly.

"Do you have magical powers?"

It was an absurd question to ask up front, but what Mary Sue could resist the opportunity to brag about her extraordinary powers?

She stopped knitting once again and looked at me as though I was bothering her. Her crimson eyes looked cold and hard, and her small mouth formed a frown. I admit I was taken a back by this.

She shook her head from side to side slowly and stared at me again.

"Do you know what a keyblade is?" I asked, hoping that this would trigger the 'OMFG! OF COURSE! Mine's called Morning-sunshine-moon- sparkle-revival-blade and it can turn heartless into unicorns!'

But her answer never came. In fact, I was a little offended that after I asked that question, she blinked and went back to knitting. Was she ignoring me?

I stood up and took a couple of steps forward. There had to be something wrong with her. I examined her closely while she knitted. Her hair was still the same color and her eye color hadn't changed within the last five minutes. Her bunny ears appeared to be real, since they flickered every time I leaned in too close. I resisted the creepy urge to smell her, not because she could easily punch me in the groin if I did (I'll be getting away easy if it was just a punch, imagine if she used her knitting needles?). I resisted because I didn't want the risk of falling for her if she indeed was a Mary sue. She might intoxicate me with a scent of poisonous pheromones that might render me a lovesick fool.

I bent down on one knee, grabbed her shoulders, and forced her to look at me.

Her crimson eyes widened for a brief moment, surprised that I would be so direct with her. She dropped her knitting needles on her lap and looked at me with a blank stare.

"Who are you and why aren't you attracted to me?" I asked, my voice sharp and demanding.

Her long ears flickered in what looked to be amusement since her facial features held no emotion.

"Not my type," came her calm reply.

It was a reasonable answer. Maybe Sora would be the one to ignite the fire in her loins.

"Why are you here?"

"School."

I raised an eyebrow. "Are you human?"

"Viera."

My grip on her shoulders loosened. Viera? What the hell was a Viera? I stood up, looking at her warily as she stared at me with her vacant face. So she wasn't human, doesn't have magical powers, and isn't attracted to me? Hm. This indeed was the rarest form of a Mary sue I'd ever seen.

Before I could further question the subject in front of me, the door swung open loudly once again. I turned quickly around, putting a good distance between Fran and me. I didn't want anyone thinking that I was taking advantage of her.

Selphie rushed forth, dragging a confused looking Kairi and an amused looking Sora after her.

"Five members, right?" She asked, letting them go. Kairi studied the room around her as she clutched her school bag while Sora scratched the back of his head, laughing nervously.

"Don't you mean four?" I asked, pointing at everyone who was standing to emphasize my point.

"Five," Selphie said, pointing at Fran.

"Don't be ridiculous, how can you possibly count her?"

Selphie walked up to the silent bunny girl and bent down to her face level.

"Fran, would you like to join my club? You still get to stay here and knit all you want."

Fran stopped knitting to look at Selphie, who smiled. She blinked, nodded her head slowly, and went back to knitting. I could feel my jaw slowly unhinging as it was about to drop.

"Then it's settled." Selphie straightened up and placed her hands on her hips. "Let the first meeting of begin!"

I wanted to protest, but it was like a train wreck. I couldn't take my eyes off this situation no matter how painful it looked.

"Now let's start with introductions; I'm the ring leader and one true god, Miss Selphie Tilmitt!"

"Kairi." Kairi looked more comfortable now, a small smile crossing her lips as she introduced herself.

"Sora." Sora's mood was harder to read with that smile on his face. It was hard to tell if he was faking it to be polite or if he really enjoyed being here. I'm praying for the former rather than the latter.

Everyone turned their gazes on me. They couldn't seriously be thinking that I was going to introduce myself to people who already know me.

The impatient tapping of Selphie's foot as she looked at me with an angry frown prompted me to speak.

I sighed.

"I'm Riku."

No one seemed to notice (or care) that I didn't sound one bit as enthusiastic as they did.

"And everyone now knows Fran," Selphie said, pointing at the bunny girl, who stopped to look up at the rest of her club mates before resuming her task.

Hn. I thought she was going to sink her Mary Sue fangs into Sora, but it seems like he's not her type. I frowned. I'll prove she's a Mary Sue even if it kills me.

"Wait a minute," I spoke after thinking about the club requirements. "You still haven't told us what this club is about Selphie."

Selphie pouted. "I thought I already did," she said, scratching her chin. "It's a club that worships me and does everything I do on command."

I glared at her. Of course she wouldn't get any other objective that sounded logical. "No Selphie, it can't be that way," I said, crossing my arms over my chest in a disapproving manner.

"But I've decided I'm the center of the universe!" She spat glaring at me.

We both stood there, trying to melt each other with our heated glares, when Kairi cleared her throat and stood between us, raising her hands up in peace.

"He's right. Your club won't get recognized if it doesn't have a legitimate reason for existing." I nodded, smirking. Finally someone on _my _side! Selphie's eyes widened at the sudden betrayal of her best friend. The brunette frowned and stuck her tongue out at me for having Kairi and logic on my side. I would've stuck out my tongue right back at her too, but I didn't. Not because it was the more mature thing to do, but because she might rip it out. Instead, I resorted to glaring back at her, hoping to make her head explode.

"How about you work around the wording of your club's theme?" Sora piped up, smiling, as if hoping to defuse the situation

I shot Sora a dirty look that said: _whose side are you on?!_

The boy just shrugged and smiled at me. I frowned, so much for having people on_ my_ side.

Selphie sighed, placing her hands on her hips. "Fine." She chewed her lip as she thought for a moment. Her eyes quickly widened after a few minutes and I held my breath, bracing myself for what was to come.

"We'll spread Selphie awareness throughout the student body!" She shouted, a fist in the air. "We'll call it the Spreading of Selphie cheer brigade, or the SOS brigade for short!"

I blinked, tilting my head to the side, forcing myself to come to terms with what she just announced.

"How is that even better?" I questioned, my eyes coming to half slits as I looked at her suspiciously.

"Think about it," she started, placing her hands back onto her hips. "The world, no this universe, is a dreary miserable place and all because it doesn't know the true happiness of worshiping me and bending toward my every demand!"

I glared at her. "Selphie!"

But she ignored me. "We'll spread cheer and happiness to the students and the community by doing things that would put smiles on their faces!" She said, eyes sparkling with mirth.

"Don't we already have a club for that?" I asked.

"It's called the community service club," Kairi replied, smiling, seeing nothing wrong with Selphie's idea.

Sora nodded, rubbing his chin in deep thought. "I see what you're getting at. We're a jack of all trades council club," he said, grinning. I shot him another dirty look because apparently, I'm the only sane one in the room, beside bunny girl over there, but she doesn't count since she refuses to acknowledge that she's attracted to me and therefore a Mary sue (I'm not bitter because I _know _I'm attractive and I'm sure she's a Mary sue).

But Sora's reasoning was just what Selphie was waiting for as she stood, posing like some DC Marvel superhero, pointing at him. "Exactly! We'll make people's wishes, desires, and needs come true. Then they'll have to become my loyal followers because I'm the only cosmic driving force that can handle such a job of creating everyone's happiness."

Come to think about it. I think Selphie Tilmitt is becoming a Mary sue. All she needs to do is sparkle more and Sora seems pretty much on board with everything she says no matter how idiotic it sounds.

"Then the world will worship me," she started, grinning madly. "Because the powers at be, which is me of course, said so and I'll rule the universe!" She then laughed, a hearty villain laugh, while I looked at her in horror.

Scratch that. Selphie Tilmitt is becoming a monster.

After laughing like a complete lunatic, Selphie cleared her throat.

"Now to decide on roles!"

I quickly snapped back from thoughts to look at her.

"Wait a minute, you asked us to help you get this club started."

Selphie studied me for a brief second. "Well yeah."

"But we have, so get new people and let us go," I said, frowning. As far as I knew, Selphie had everything she needed.

"I don't mind staying."

I looked at Sora with my mouth opened. I quickly snapped it shut and walked over to the brunet, pulling him off to the side. Selphie didn't seem to care as she started to talk animatedly to Kairi about her club plans.

"Sora."

"What? It can't be that bad," he said shrugging. I looked from him to Selphie, who seemed to be laughing at something only she found funny as she was laughing like an idiot while Kairi laughed awkwardly as she inched away from her best friend. I looked back to Sora and pointed to Selphie.

Sora winced. "It can't get worse?"

I rolled my eyes. "Sora, we promised to help her get started. We did and she's fine. Selphie is perfectly capable of getting people to replace us."

"Riku," he started. He looked from me to Selphie who was trying to convince a now giggling Kairi that she was serious about one issue or other. He looked back to me, his eyes dark with a deep ocean hue. They softened, his blue pools almost quivering. I'll admit, that even I'm vulnerable to his puppy dog look from time to time, so it was hard looking into his eyes while trying to be annoyed with him.

"Aren't you the least bit curious as to what Selphie is really up to?"

"To be honest with you…no." I deadpanned.

Sora sucked his teeth. "Oh come on! You're telling me that ever since we've come back, there's nothing inside of you that's telling you to go forth and explore something new? Don't you have something calling you to an adventure?" he asked, crossing his arms.

I rolled my eyes.

"Sora, this is not the call to adventure I've been waiting to hear." I licked my lips as I thought about going for what I was thinking about earlier today at lunch. "What about us going on another adventure again? Don't you want to visit all the friends you've made in different worlds?"

Sora looked down towards the floor as he mulled my questions over. I hoped my questions would've gotten a more enthusiastic reaction like a tackle or something, rather than him avoiding eye contact. But when Sora looked up with a smile on his lips, my heart jumped. Maybe there was some hope after all and I won't have to chloroform him and hide him in my closet until our trip.

"That would be something fun to do for the summer," he said. "But I like it here too. Riku, there's a reason why we're home. We have friends. We have family here. What's so wrong with wanting to be home and acting normal for a change?"

"There's everything wrong with it," I growled.

"Why?"

"Because it'll always be the same!"

Sora shrank back from my small outburst. Now it was my turn to look down at the floor as my cheeks heated up with embarrassment. I don't know where that came from, but I was growing so angry with Sora. Why couldn't he see that our life on the island is as miserable as it was before our adventure? We don't do anything fun anymore. We don't spar, we rarely take the gummi ship anywhere, and we barely see each other because of school work or Sora's stupid student government. It wasn't fair. Sora went up and changed on me while I was the only one keeping our dream of going out and living life to its fullest alive.

"Riku." I looked up to see Sora's worried look, which consisted of a frowning forehead, a pout, and deep navy blue eyes. I always feel like a tool when he gives me that look and I have to bite the inside of my cheeks before I break down and start hysterically begging for his forgiveness.

"Are you girls done gossiping?" Selphie piped up, "I still have to give everyone their roles."

I turned from Sora and forced myself to smile.

"Yes, we're done," I said, through clenched teeth.

"Great!" The perky girl walked up to us. She pushed us out of the way to stand in the middle of the room.

"To reiterate, I am the leader, God, Buddha, and Jesus." She then pointed to her best friend. "Kairi, you're our mascot fashionista because every group needs to have eye candy to bring in more members."

"But—"

"Sora," She continued, ignoring Kairi's protests. "You're Vice President."

My jaw dropped.

"How is that even fair?" I asked angrily. "I was the one who gave you the idea and did most of the work!"

"Silence minion number two!"

"What?!"

My eyebrow twitched. I'm not even minion number one!

"Today is the first unofficial meeting of the SOS brigade," Selphie said, ignoring my obvious rage over being minion number two. "But I promise that our first official meeting will be better. Until we can properly announce our entrance into the club world, we meet three times a week. That's today Monday, Wednesday, and Friday! Got it?"

Kairi winced. "My Honors club meets on Wednesdays can we switch a day?" she asked.

Selphie shook her head. "Have them meet Tuesdays."

I glared at her. "Hey, you can't just—"

"Oh, would you mind finishing the form and bringing it to the office. Good boy number two" Selphie said, giving me the form and patting my head before I got another word in.

"Meeting adjourned!" And with that the lunatic skipped out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

There was an eerie silence in the room as we all stared at the door. Fran didn't seem phased by anything that has happened and continued to knit, the soft clicking sounds of her needles echoing in the room. I glared at Sora, my face heating up in rage.

"It can't get worse?!" I roared.

The brunet only laughed nervously, raising his hands up, alleging innocence.

* * *

**note: **Well, I hope you guys liked it so far. And yes, Fran is from Final Fantasy 12.


	3. Episode 3: Access Denied

**Episode 3: Access Denied

* * *

**

It's been a week since Selphie started her cult and I can think of ten better places to be at the moment then being in this stuffy club room. So far, Kairi has had to skip one of her own club meetings, but the redhead was very optimistic about Selphie's club. Sora was another person who saw that the glass was half full and fully supported being here. I'm the only one who thinks this is a horrible idea and that the glass is empty and going to fall off the edge of the table and shatter because that's how pessimistic I feel about the future of this club. I don't know what Fran thinks since she just sits there and knits and doesn't really say anything, which brings me to question if the bunny girl ever leaves the club room in the first place.

"Riku, pay attention!" Selphie snapped, slapping a ruler on the table to get my attention. I scowled at her like a child being chided by his mother.

"Anyway," she started, ignoring my sour face. "I'd like to introduce our club's newest equipment!" She went into her messenger bag and produced a laptop.

Everyone with the exception of Fran looked impressed and went to stand around her. I was the only one who looked at the computer with any ounce of suspicion as she set it up and turned it on.

"Selphie, why do we even need a laptop?" I asked, bringing my chair over to see.

"We obvious need this laptop to generate interest in our club Riku," she said, rolling her eyes, as if that were the most obvious answer in the world. "We need to spread the word of Selphie-ism online! So it's your job to make us a really cool website."

"Wait? Why me?" At this point, I shouldn't be surprised that I was giving the job of making our website since I've practically done _everything _necessary to get this club started.

"Because you're the only one who knows how." Okay, I can buy that. Sora and computers don't really mix since he'll just keyblade it to dust and as much of a nerd Kairi is, I doubt she has the patience to fool around with photoshop.

"So, where'd you get it?" Sora asked as I took control of the laptop. It seemed very advanced as it had the latest updates and programs. It must've cost a fortune.

"The computer club, obviously," Selphie replied, snorting.

I stopped fiddling with the latest version of photoshop to look at her.

"How?" I asked, suspiciously.

The brunette merely shook her head, "Don't worry about it. I got the laptop, that's what matters."

Which translates to 'I stole it' in Selphie's mother tongue. There was no sense in arguing with her since it'll result in another shouting match between us. It's been a week since this club has started and I'm the only one willing to bump heads with her on anything. Kairi just smiles and nods and Sora is basically on board with everything she says, which makes me question if the boy is seriously crushing on her or something. Fran just sits there and knits so I can't really call her an ally as she refuses to admit that she finds me attractive (She's gonna be all over me one of these days, I swear.)

"Okay, with you working on our website, the rest of us can see if we have any requests."

She snapped her fingers towards Sora who went and got the request box. What was he? Her puppy? I frowned and continued to explore what was on the laptop, completely uninterested in whatever else she had planned.

I heard the metal clank of the box's top against the surface of the desk as Sora looked inside of it. "There's nothing in it," he said, pouting.

"What!?" Selphie stood up, snatching the box from Sora. "What do you mean there's nothing there!" She turned the box upside down and shook it to make sure that its contents were spilled out. But her actions revealed what Sora only confirmed a few minutes ago, nothing.

"This is ridiculous!" She dropped the box and fell back into her seat. "And after Kairi and I worked so hard to advertise last week!"

I rolled my eyes.

"Um, I don't think the principal appreciated the two of you skipping around handing out pamphlets in bikinis."

Selphie glared at me. "Hey, it got us attention!"

I looked up from the computer to throw her a dirty look. "Of the wrong kind Selphie!"

Because having the principal himself run out of his office to chase down two bikini clad students is good attention. It didn't help that by the time Sora and I showed up to help, Selphie was being carried away by said principal, screaming at the top of her lungs that he was not her friend and that no, she does not want to go inside his office, no matter how much candy he had, helped give a good impression. Suffice to say, the principal is being investigated by the police on child molestation.

"Maybe we should try a different approach, like having a bake sale that has the club's logo on the cookies." Kairi said, trying to stop us from yet another shouting match.

"We can't do that! They'll just eat and never come," Selphie whined.

She stood up from her seat, her face dark. Now when Selphie gets that look on her face, the one where her eyes darken and her mouth twitches into something evil, something sinister is about to begin. I tensed in my seat since I'm usually the default victim for all of her abuse. "This is a state of emergency and I'm afraid we're going to have to break out the big guns," she said, placing her hands on her hips.

Sora looked at her with a confused pout on his face. "What guns?"

"Those guns," she said, pointing towards Kairi's chest.

My eyes widened when she tackled the redhead to the floor. I shot up from my seat to intervene. Selphie was trying to pry Kairi's fingers off the redhead's blouse.

"Selphie what do you think you're doing!" I growled, grabbing her by the shoulders, trying to get her off of Kairi, whose eyes were screwed shut as she held onto her own shirt of dear life.

"Seeing the goods!" she reasoned, trying again to pop some buttons off of Kairi's blouse. "We all know that Kairi has a bigger chest than me! Admit it, look at it!"

And as if seeing wasn't believing she shoved my face into the unfortunate girl's chest, which was finally exposed to reveal a lacy black bra with pink trimming. My face quickly heated up as it made contact with Kairi's soft supple breasts and the girl squealed, trying to push my head away. I mentally grunted. Fine, they were bigger than Selphie's, but that didn't mean the maniac had to make me intimate with them on a face to breast basis! I gathered what ever strength I could (because really, Kairi smelled really nice and her breasts were really soft) and stood up, holding my nose in the hopes that it wasn't bleeding.

"Why did you do that for?" I roared, my face flushed with heated embarrassment.

Selphie glared at me as she stood up to join me, abandoning a whimpering Kairi to cover herself.

"I was merely showing you how plentiful her bosoms were!" she shouted at me.

Sora stood up from his seat to meekly butt into our argument.

"Guys…"

"That was grossly inappropriate!" I yelled, ignoring Sora's lame attempt at trying to calm us down.

"Hey, guys—"

"No it wasn't!" Selphie roared, equally ignoring him. "We're amongst friends! It's not like we haven't seen each other naked before."

"That's because we haven't seen each other naked!"

Selphie stopped to think for a moment. "You know what, you're right." She giggled. "It's only me who likes to peek into the boy's locker-" I looked at her with my eyes wide and she cleared her throat once she noticed she went off on a tangent. "ANYWAYS!" She continued, "We can sell sexy pictures of Kairi and get awareness!"

"Hey guys!"

"We are not prostituting Kairi!"

Fran had already gotten up from her seat to give the redhead her light sweater to cover herself up.

"It's not prostitution!" Selphie shouted back trying to reason.

"Is too!" I yelled, stomping my foot to mean that I was pissed off and wasn't going to let her get away with embarrassing one of my best friends.

"Is not!" she stomped back.

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"YOU GUYS! SHUT THE HELL UP!" Sora roared over us. Everyone went silent, turning their heads to look at the red faced brunet who looked angry enough to keyblade us to death. Even Fran, who seemed to have the complete emotional characteristics of a tic-tac, looked up in amazement from her position next to Kairi.

Sora calmed down, clearing his throat as he straightened up his tie. "Thank you," he said, more composed. "There's another alternative to get more members and requests. There's a club fair next week."'

Selphie cheered up at the statement and quickly went to Sora's side. "That's it! We'll get a booth at the club fair and get more people to join or request something!"

I snorted, going to help both Kairi and Fran up from the floor. Only my eyes seemed to wander straight towards Kairi's chest when I went to help her up. I diverted my eyes to look somewhere else, despite the slight blush on my cheeks. I went and stood by Fran, the obvious Mary Sue, since I felt nervous around Kairi.

"Sora, I could kiss you!" Selphie smiled, pinching the boy's cheek. "But I won't since I don't want to make you know who…" and she obviously pointed to me. "…feel left out," she whispered, winking. I rolled my eyes, because even if she were giving out kisses, I wouldn't want her poisonous lips on mine.

"We'll blow the other clubs away! Our booth is gonna rock!"

She then took a bored looking Fran and a stunned Kairi and started talking a mile a minute about her ideas for our booth. I glared at Sora for giving her yet another idea and he just laughed uneasily, scratching the back of his head. I stood there with a brooding scowl because that's what I do most of the time Selphie manages to get her way.

"Riku! I don't see you working on that website!"

I sighed and went back to mess around with the computer. Why couldn't a stray lighting bolt strike me dead?

* * *

"I am devastated! Simply and utterly devastated!" Selphie dramatically whined, posing on top of table where Sora and I were having our lunch. No one on the cafeteria grounds seemed to notice or care about her elaborate performance.

I swallowed the bit of sandwich that I'd been chewing and pondered for a bit.

"So, let me get this straight," I started, putting my sandwich down. "You're…devastated?"

That earned me a fierce glare from her, which amused me a little. Selphie did not like my cock-sure smirk and resorted to stealing my sandwich and taking a huge bite out of it in revenge for mocking her. I frowned as she chewed.

"What's wrong?" Sora asked, touching her shoulder, looking genuinely concerned. I snorted and crossed my arms over my chest. Only Sora would be naïve enough to buy into Selphie's dramatics. Selphie, seeing that Sora had taken the bait, shoved me over to sit next to him. I scowled, growing more and more annoyed by her.

"We can't be in the club fair!" She cried, hysterically. Sora's features went from a sympathetic pout to an over protective scowl.

"What? Why?"

"Because we're not apparently an 'official' club yet. What does that mean?" She grabbed onto Sora, nuzzling into his neck as she continued to cry. "I thought club fairs were about getting people to join!" Sora patted the sobbing girls back affectionately.

"There, there, calm down," he said, in a soothing voice. He looked up to me for help and I just rolled my eyes. He obviously needed a reality check if he thought I was going to help. Instead of offering my own comforting words, I sat there watching her elaborate performance with a bored expression on my face. Sora actually glared at me when I choked down a laugh when Selphie started hiccupping.

"That doesn't make sense," Sora said, his voice sounding at bit more peeve because of my lack of sensitivity. "Maybe you should try again."

Selphie pulled back, sniffling back snot. Gross.

"Can't you do anything Sora since you're on student government?" She asked, rubbing her eyes. Sora chewed on his lip, as he thought and looked at me for support. I, again, didn't want to be involved and raised my hands up, absolving myself from the situation.

"I'm sorry, but I have no authority over whose club gets to be in the fair, that's up to the director of the student board of activities," he lamented.

Selphie frowned, sobering up and drying up her fake tears. "Then why the hell am I crying on you for!" She snorted, quickly standing up and walking away, angry that she probably wasted her time.

Sora blinked. Shocked by the complete one-eighty Selphie just pulled on him. I started chewing on the end of my straw, amused by his confusion.

"What just happened?" he asked, tilting his head to the side as if examining the situation.

"You just got used," I said, nonchalantly.

Sora shrugged. "Hn. It wasn't very exciting," he said, taking a bite out of his lunch.

I leaned on my elbows, my hands cupping my head.

"Just be happy she didn't use you and throw you out like some used Kleenex like she does me."

Sora laughed and I smirked, shaking my head as I went back to chewing on my straw. It was then that I realized this moment became one of those rare occasions where I actually felt happy. Where putting a smile on Sora's face was enough to make my day and the fact that he was the only person willing to try to understand me, made staying on this floating rock of an island more bearable. I felt at ease around him, which is not how I feel when I'm around Selphie. Little did I know that this sense of comfort and safety would soon morph into a foreboding sense of danger and fear later on in the day.

* * *

I was happily minding my own business, staring out the window watching the girls blitzball team practice when I sensed the air around me drop a couple of degrees. I saw the devil in carnet from my peripheral vision and decided that if I don't give her the attention she would eventually rape from me later, there would be hell to pay. My chair fell forward from the lazy reclined position I had it in earlier as I turned my neck to face her.

She leaned forward on the back of her chair and smiled. "I found out how we can get in the club fair," She said, without skipping a beat. I looked into her bright green eyes, and licked my lips gearing up to put my game face on. Only when I opened my mouth I didn't expect for my brain to come out with a question rather than a snarky comment.

"How?"

"Well, there's a girl, Maria, who is in charge of deciding which clubs get to go on. I figure that if I talk to her, then our application won't get denied."

I crossed my arms over my chest, raising an eyebrow.

"And how pray tell are we going to talk to her? Wouldn't a person like that be busy since the fair is next week?"

"Well," Selphie chewed her bottom lip, "I was kind of hoping that you would play a part in it, like in seducing her."

My eyes widened. I'll admit that girls find me attractive enough to want to go out with me, but me seducing a girl? I could barely flirt my way out of paper bag, let alone flirt with a girl! I know a guy my age should have a healthy libido when it comes to the ladies and should be able to get a date no problem, but I've been pretty busy these last few years fighting heartless and the war against the organization. I mean, how can a guy adequately pick up a girl when his entire being is consumed by the darkness?

My face hardened as I gave her my reply. "I am not going to seduce her."

Selphie sighed rolling her eyes. "Fine then, how about strongly encouraging her with your lips?"

"Rephrasing it will not make it better!"

"Oh come on," She said, leaning forward, smiling. "I'm sure girls find you…" She thought for a second, looking up, "Oh what's the word," she chewed on her lip in concentration. "Hot! Yeah, that's it." I rolled my eyes and sighed, wanting to be anywhere or _anyone_ for that matter.

"Girls find your dead personality…hot."

"I do not have a dead personality!"

"And that's what he said," Selphie said, giggling.

"That doesn't even apply to that phrase!"

The perky girl laughed. "I know, I just wanted to say it since it makes anything you say dirty."

I could feel a headache start to form inside the walls of my skull. "Selphie, is there a point to this conversation?" I asked, rubbing the bridge of my nose, wishing for a brain aneurism to render me deaf and blind.

"Oh yes." And before I could react, she had me by the tie. "We're going to meet Maria right now!" And like a true cave woman, she dragged me out of the classroom as if I were her mate.

By the time we got to the cafeteria ground, my face was a nice shade of purple. When she let me go, I managed to take off the offending choking device and put the tie in my pocket. Selphie then pulled me over to hide with her behind the wall parallel to the window.

"Okay, that's her over there," she whispered, as if the entire thing were a mission. I dusted myself off and peered outside the curve of the wall. At the farthest table in the back was a group of girls laughing and talking while eating their lunch. The girl all the others were surrounding, the one with the fair skin, the dark hair up in pigtails wearing red rim glasses was Maria.

Selphie pushed me forward from our hiding spot behind the wall.

"Now go over there and make me proud."

I turned around quickly. "Aren't you coming with me?" I asked, taking her wrist and pulling her forward.

She pulled her wrist back.

"Why?"

"Because it's _your _club," I seethed.

"It's _our _club" she corrected, placing her hands on her hips. "It would be awkward with you flirting with her and me standing there. I'll feel like your pimp or something."

I rolled my eyes because it was probably true.

"Plus, I don't want to give off the wrong impression that I'm making you do this."

"But you are!"

"Stop complaining and go!" she yelled, pushing me. I scowled and stomped my way through the grounds. When I got up to the table, Maria and her friends quickly stopped talking. They all looked at me, their eyes studying their prey. I felt my body tingle with nerves as I started to panic. I swallowed thickly and cleared my throat.

Maria twirled her black braid around her finger, studying me with an amused smirk on her face. "Um. Can I help you?" she asked.

I looked over my shoulder to see Selphie in the distance. She mouthed to me to smile and I craned my neck back, teeth clenched in an awkward smile. Maria's friends giggled.

"Well I was wondering…" The girls looked on, each sporting a mischievous grin as if hoping that I would ask their friend out. Maria only raised a curious eyebrow.

I sighed.

"Look, I'll be frank," I started, licking my lips. "My friend, Selphie, I'm sure you've heard of her since well…" I paused to think of something to say. I quickly looked to see if Selphie was still there and the brunette shot me a glare so heated it would've set my hair on fire. I looked at the group of girls, "… It's common knowledge that she's the devil in carnet. Anyway, we made this club and we'd really appreciate it if you'd give us the chance at participating in the club fair next week."

Maria pondered for a bit, playing with her braid. I looked on, swallowing thickly, hoping that my ravishing good looks were enough to get the club on board. But when I heard her say, "Sorry, no can do," as she shook her head, I could feel my left eye twitch with annoyance.

I frowned. "Why?"

She snorted and rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over he chest as she leaned forward to rest her elbows on the lunch table. "Listen up pretty boy," she said, snidely, "Her club doesn't deserve to be placed on the school's map. A Selphie awareness club?" The raven hair girl scowled. "Please, fifth graders can come up with better club themes."

"But it's not just about Selphie awareness. Our club is about helping people out and finding them happiness."

I stopped myself before going any further. Why was I defending the club? Could be it be that deep down in the frozen depths of my heart I actually care about this obnoxious club? Or maybe it's the fact that Selphie is clearly only five feet away and can still, in that short distance, be on me in a split second to rip the flesh off my bones if I were to disobey her.

Yeah. That's it. I'll go with the latter and call it fear.

But it seemed that Maria wasn't buying into my good looks or my lame attempts at doing the club some sort of justice.

"That's what the community service club is for," she replied.

I nodded. Because it was a good point, a fine damn good point that I couldn't argue.

"Listen," I said, placing my hands in my pockets. "We just want a booth, is that too much to ask for?"

"Yes it is!" Maria untangled her arms to slam her hands onto the table to glare at me of all innocent victims. "Especially when that little tart…" she pointed over my shoulder in Selphie's general direction. I looked over to see Selphie's eyes widen, "…had the nerve to seduce my boyfriend to get his laptop!"

I raised an eyebrow. Well, it was good to know where the source of Maria's white hot rage was coming from. I rolled my eyes when Selphie mouthed the words 'she's clearly lying, now kiss her so that I can flee to safety!' and turned my attention back to a seething Maria.

"She kissed my boyfriend, the president of the computer club and managed to black mail him with that by making him give up their newest laptop!" she snapped in a shrill voice that made me wince.

I opened my mouth, but then closed it, trying to think of something comforting to say. But the throbbing vein on Maria's forehead was telling me that I would get my tongue ripped out if I tried. Instead, I resorting to fleeing like a coward, telling the angry girl that I understood and that I would tell Selphie. The girl merely snorted at my meek reply and I walked away, a scowl on my lips as I walked towards Selphie's hiding spot. I grabbed the perky brunette, snatching her out of her corner.

"Riku, I thought we discussed that you were going to play tonsil hockey with—"

"She doesn't want to give us a booth!" I snapped, letting her go.

"What! Why?!" she asked, sickly innocent of what Maria just accused her of earlier. I rolled my eyes and sighed.

"Selphie, you stuck your tongue down her boyfriend's throat and stole his laptop!"

She placed her hands on her hips. "Oh please, he wasn't even that good of a kisser," she snorted. "That loser," she muttered as an after thought.

"Selphie!"

"What!?"

"You can't go around kissing people's boyfriends, stealing, black mailing, and whatever else you do that's evil in order to get your way!" I chided.

Selphie sucked her teeth, annoyed that I was treating her like a child. In hindsight, she was acting like child, a very spoiled, obnoxious child that would throw a tantrum if she didn't get her way. And she was oblivious to this because of her ridiculous notion of being the center of the universe (as if that's not selfish and insane enough) but I'm getting a bit ahead of myself and the plot. The point was the girl was morphing into a monster and there was nothing I could do at the moment in time but to let her do what she wanted in the hopes that she would get bored and free me of her slavery.

"Whatever," she muttered. "If she's not going to let us in, then we're going to have to let ourselves in." she said, her eyes dark with determination.

I sighed and didn't bother to fight her as she pulled me by my collar and started dragging me to some unknown location.

* * *

**note: **next week's episode will be late since I'm starting school next week and have to figure out how to fit this in along with my course work and my job. thanks for reading!


	4. Episode 4: The Spectacular Extravaganza

**Episode 4: The Spectacular Extravaganza

* * *

**

The door to the clubroom violently swung open, the sound of it making contact with the wall breaking my attention away from my homework as hurricane Selphie barreled inside. I frowned as I took off my reading glasses and Fran, the obvious Mary sue, who I swore was totally staring at me, only, not really, she was just quietly knitting, (we made eye contact a few times when I _thought_ she was staring at me, but she was probably staring at the poster behind me) looked up from her knitting needles.

Selphie, being the endless ball of energy that she is, looked around the room like a crazy person, her eyes darting everywhere, making sure her team was intact. Her lips soon pulled into a pout as she realized that she was missing two important people.

"Where are Sora and Kairi?" she raised an accusing eyebrow at me of all people, as if I were hiding them. I rolled my eyes and put my books away, knowing that any peace and quite that I had before in order to concentrate on my work was now loss.

"They're spending time with, you know, their clubs," I replied, pushing my chair out to stand.

Selphie crossed her arms over her chest and gave me an incredulous look.

"What?" she asked, as if she didn't understand my previous statement.

I felt my left eyebrow twitch as I tried to control my anger. I rubbed the bridge of my nose to try to calm myself down.

"Sora is at a student government meeting and Kairi is helping out in the honor club," I said with an exhausted sigh.

Selphie didn't not take the news lightly, her face quickly contorted with anger as her green eyes darkened and her lips formed a tight sour pout.

"What!?" she shrilled, indignant. "I mean, if they were skipping out on our club to make out or something, that's a different story. I wouldn't have a problem with it because I'll never stand in the way of their love!" She dramatically posed, puffing her cheeks with her hands on her hips. "But to think that after selling their souls" I glared at her, my lips frowning, warning her to watch out of how she spoke about _my _best friends. "I mean," she quickly corrected, "pledging their loyalty to me, they go out and betray me like this! It's ridiculous!"

"Selphie," I interrupted her melodramatic tirade. "They were in those clubs way before this cult you call a club was formed."

She had the audacity to growl at me.

"Fine!" She stalked over to her chair at the head of the table and roughly pulled it out, plopping herself into it. She cradled her head with her hands, looking like a small child whose parents had just recently reprimanded her.

I looked on, more curious than worried. I'd never seen Selphie act like this before. Sure, she had her moments where her tantrums could trump those of a well experienced spoiled five year old, but this time, it was different. It felt different. And despite the distance between us, her, at the head of the table, and me, on the other end, I could feel something oozing out of her at the moment. It was a melancholy so rich that it threatened to smother even me and for a brief second it made me think of the thick darkness that threatened to overtake me once before. She looked up at me; her dark eyes making my heart skip a beat as if I were nervous. I stared back at her, determined to make my heart's rhythm return back to normal.

"Promise me you won't leave me like they did," she said, her voice devoid of any previous anger. Instead it sounded soft, almost like a whisper.

My eyes widened, my mind reeling and my heart went from skipping like a record to pumping into sonic overdrive.

"W-what are y-you talking about—"

"Promise me!" she interrupted my nervous babble. Her voice sounded hurt, almost pleading.

And for the first time in the history of our quasi-friendship, I nodded, willingly agreeing to her request. It was then that I realized, that despite Selphie's insane behavior, that she was human like everyone else (excluding Fran, but that's because she's a Marysue). I saw a hollowing sorrow lingering there, something that couldn't be fulfilled despite all her desperate attempts at trying to find something to fill the void. I told myself then, that as her friend, I should try to be more sensitive when it comes to her feelings and be more considerate towards her wishes since it was obvious that Selphie's biggest fear was also one that I could identify with: being left all alone.

I averted my eyes, looking at my feet since I couldn't bear to keep looking into her forest green eyes since my cheeks seemed to think that flaring up at the sight of them was funny.

"I promise I won't leave," I said back, licking my lips. I suddenly found that if I didn't steady my heart beat, it would eventually burst into flames in my chest.

"Promise?" I heard her ask, as if making sure. I looked up then, seeing her look at her most vulnerable. She looked like her existence relied on my answer and if I were to say no, the devastating news would kill her.

I simply nodded, not trusting my voice to deliver the answer since I feared it might crack due to this inexplicable nervousness I was feeling. Wait. Why was I so nervous all of a sudden? Could it be that I was afraid of hurting her? That I couldn't live with myself if I made her cry? Or was it that I was slowly but surely starting to care and that this sudden nervousness was actually sympathy in disguise. Whatever the case may be, I knew that I did the right thing when Selphie's melancholy look vanished and a sweet happy smile soon curved on her lips. The nervousness I was feeling was soon gone, replaced with a sense of relief.

The bubbly brunet stood up from her chair, hands now spread on the table.

"Now, to get to business since those slackers aren't here."

I pulled out my chair and took a seat, wondering what else the brunet had cooked up this time that may or may not shed some years of my youth do to the stress that it would bring.

"I figured out a way we can get our club to participate in the club fair."

My brow rose curiously. "Did you steal another's club's booth?"

Selphie's eyes widened in what appeared to be shock. "Riku, I'm surprised at you! Why would I deny another club their right to participate in the fair?!" she said, scandalized.

I couldn't stop the edge of my lips from curling into a smirk as the thought of Selphie finally not being able to get what she wanted amused me.

"They didn't give into your bribe?" I asked, trying hard not to laugh.

"Not a damn dime." She said shaking her head. "And to think, I got a new lacy push up bra to tempt them further, wanna see?"

"No!" I quickly replied. My cheeks flushed immediately as my mind traveled back to the horrible incident with Kairi.

Selphie rolled her eyes, buttoning up her blouse. I didn't know whether to feel relieved or disappointed.

"Anyway," she started. "I figured that if can't get a booth, why not still go and show off what our club is made of."

The way her eyes just glisten with excitement just screams that I won't like where this is going.

"We're going to perform on the roof!" She chirped as if it were the best idea ever.

I cringed at the thought of us on the roof, making complete fools of ourselves while Selphie screamed and shouted from a megaphone for people to join our club.

"Isn't that illegal?" I asked, raising my brow in suspicion.

Selphie just shook her head. "Of course not! I picked the lock the other day, it's perfectly fine."

I frowned. It was totally illegal.

Before I could start my lecture on the law and the consequences of breaking it, Sora and Kairi came into the club room. Kairi looked at bit more flushed than usual, her cheeks pink and her bangs sticking to her forehead. As if that weren't enough, her uniform was a bit wrinkled too. The girl looked like she'd just run a marathon and I couldn't help but wonder what she was actually doing besides attending her honor's club meeting. Sora on the other hand, looked relatively composed, his hair was the mass mess of spikes as usual. Selphie walked up to the pair, her hands on her hips.

"It's about time! Where were you guys? Riku was feeding me lies about you guys in other clubs. "

Sora pouted. "But we were with other clubs," he said, side stepping the brunette to come over to sit next to me.

"Oh, by the way, Sora, if you're going to make out with Kairi, the decent thing you can do is pop a couple of buttons, hickeys are so fifteen minutes ago," Selphie said, pointing at Kairi's very obvious hickey. Kairi's face quickly flared up in embarrassment and Sora just nervously chuckled, scratching the back of his head.

I was skeptical, crossing my arms over my chest as I sat next to Sora. Sora wouldn't be able to pop open Kairi's blouse since he'll probably just die of shock from just holding her hand.

Suspicion aside, Selphie got our attention by clearing her throat.

"Well, now that everyone is here, I can tell you guys my plans for the club festival. As you already know, we didn't get a booth because certain people…" She turned around to glare at me for emphasis. "…aren't team players—"

"You made out with her boyfriend!" I snapped.

"No! That's called being a team player! I took one for the team!" she growled back.

"So where are we going to display our club?" Kairi asked, preventing us from fighting even further.

Selphie's anger quickly melted away at the question. She turned to her best friend, smiling. "We're going to perform on the roof of the school during the club fair!" Selphie cheered.

There was an awkward silence as Kairi looked at her, chewing her bottom lip. Sora looked like he didn't know whether to laugh or look mortified. Fran kept on knitting and I stared at the floor, willing it with my non-existent telepathic powers to swallow me whole.

"What's wrong?" she asked looking around the room. "Are you guys not likening the idea? Are you guys afraid of heights?"

"Selphie it's not that," Kairi spoke up after a bit of silence.

"Then what?"

"Well, I lied. It is the fact that it's on the roof. We can get into huge trouble if we try pulling off something like that." The redhead looked to Sora and I for support.

"But think of all the attention our club will get. With this performance we'll be on the club map. Everyone will know who we are and we'll get requests!"

"Maybe more people will want to join the club if they see the performance," Sora suggested, rubbing his chin in thought.

My eyes widened. I didn't know whether I should kiss the boy for the brilliant idea that may lead to my freedom or punch him for the simple fact that he supported Selphie and saw nothing wrong with what she was suggesting.

"And if more people join, then you guys can only show up when you want to and go out to do whatever it is that you guys do," Selphie added, nodding.

"Like their clubs?" I asked.

"Yeah, right their clubs," Selphie said, rolling her eyes and doing the quotation mark stance with her fingers as if she wasn't buying it.

Kairi walked towards the table, taking her seat opposite of Sora and I.

"So how are we going to get up there and what do we have planned?" the redhead asked, settling down a bit.

"Oh that's easy," Selphie replied, walking towards the head of the table, where she normally sat. "As I already told Riku, I've picked the lock to the roof door already. As for our performance…"

Selphie bent down, picking up a box from underneath the table. She set the brown box down, opening it and revealing some dark purple sequenced clothes.

"We're going to have a jazz theme" she said, picking out a top hat and donning it on her head.

I cringed at the outfits as she passed them around. They consisted of a pair of sequenced black booty shorts, sequenced purple top with matching sequenced gloves, and some hats. I couldn't imagine a worst death than shimmying and shaking my stuff as I fall seven stories to the ground. I looked towards Sora, hoping the boy would share my look of horror. I was surprised and slightly offended that the boy was looking at our apparel with a hint of interest and curiosity.

I looked around the table and noticed that Fran didn't receive an outfit. This didn't surprise me since the bunny girl has become almost a piece of necessary furniture for a club room instead of an actual club member. Despite that, I didn't want her not flaunting her goods like the rest of us. If I'm going down, I'm bringing _everyone _with me.

"How come Fran doesn't get one?" I asked, glaring at the _obvious _Mary sue who still _refuses _to admit how obviously attracted she is to me. Look at her, ignoring me as she knits. Deep down, her lust for me is driving her mad!

"Because she's in charge of the music and pyrotechnics. No one will be able to see her!"

"Pyrotechnics!" I shouted, indignantly.

Selphie nodded, collecting our uniforms and putting them back into the box. "Yes, pyrotechnics. We have to jazz up our performance somehow."

"Selphie that's impossible!" I argued, standing up from my chair to plant both hands onto the table as if I meant business. "First of all, I'm sure that's a hundred different kinds of illegal. Second, where are we going to get the money to get all the equipment, and finally, you're insane and did I forget to mention how illegal all of this was!"

"Don't worry about all of that. Tidus knows a guy who knows a guy that's willing to lend up his DJ equipment if we promise to take care of it and pay him a reasonable price." She then pointed to the box of uniforms. "As for the other stuff, we can all pool in our resources to make up for the additional costs."

I gave her a skeptical look, my left eyebrow raising a little as I sat back down in my seat.

Selphie patted my head. "Riku, it'll be fine!" she chirped, sensing my distrust. I rolled my eyes, watching her pull Kairi to the side as she asked about the hickey and practically almost smothered the redhead into her chest as she spoke animatedly about her little girl becoming a woman.

"She could be right you know." My eyes shifted to the side, where Sora was looking at me.

"Just give it a chance, Riku. Maybe this is the something that you're looking for to keep you happy," he said, smiling. And I swear I could feel my shoulders with a bit of guilt because it's not like I'm unhappy or depressed. Yes, I'm a little discontent with my life at the moment, but not so much so that I'm crying a river over it. I should've known better than to feel that way since I'm surrounded with great friends like Sora and Kairi. But for some reason, not even the thought of having my best friends with me sounded that comforting.

* * *

I should've known that when Selphie means pooling in our resources, it meant sucking me dry out of my hard earned summer money to buy illegal fire works. The days leading up towards the fair were exhausting to say the least. Selphie had it in her mind that we should incorporate choreography, but we pretty soon learned that Sora had two left feet, so that idea was stopped dead in its tracks. Instead, she just wanted Sora and I to pelvic thrust a lot while she and Kairi shimmied and shook. I, of course, refused to do anything she wanted me to do during all of our rehearsals, including donning that _ridiculous _excuse of a uniform. I don't see how pelvic thrusting wearing sequenced black booty shorts isn't traumatizing for me and everyone around me, but Selphie said it added a magical appeal to the club as females (and possibly some males) will be lured by my glorious virility. I reasoned that I didn't want any more stalkers than I already got from the whole kingdom hearts fiasco since Square Enix thought it funny to finally come out with a Riku action figure. Selphie, as usual, ignored my reasons and feelings on the subject and almost shoved my goods in aforementioned shorts. I managed to dodge the attack, snatching the shorts from her, and stomping away from the group to put them on myself.

Finally, Judgment Day came. School is always a half a day on Saturdays, so most festivities and events took place on those days after classes. I'd just finish taking my mathematics course and met up with Sora. He was chatting next to me as we walked towards the club room. We stopped in our tracks when we heard a screeching moan of anger from the other side of the door. We paused, debating whether or not we should open the door to find out where the sound was coming from. As Sora reached for the knob, my hand quickly attacked itself to his wrist, stopping him.

"Wait!" I hissed, realizing that this could finally be our chance to run away screaming for our lives. "Let's run away together!"

Sora's eyes widened at my suggestion.

"Sora! Please, it's our only chance!" To which Sora looked at me with a confused look, lips forming a pout.

"Riku, it can't be all that bad," he said, turning the knob and pushing the door open.

We were met with a disheveled looking club room, papers thrown about everywhere, the table and chairs skewed about. At the center of the chaos was Selphie, wailing into her hands as Kairi spoke in soft tones to comfort her. Fran stood by with a cup of water, kneeling down next to the sobbing brunette, wanting her to take a sip in the hopes of calming her down.

Sora and I walked in immediately, concern taking precedence on our faces. I've seen her throw tantrums before, but I've never seen her this upset before.

"What's wrong?" Sora asked, pulling up a chair to talk to Selphie.

The depressed girl looked up, her eyes red, puffy, and full of tears as she sniffled. She just broke down crying again, taking comfort into Sora's arms. The boy could only hug her and rub her back, telling her that it was okay.

I beckoned Kairi over to the side.

"What's wrong?" I asked making sure my voice was low.

Kairi chewed her bottom lip as she delivered the news. "Someone stole the outfits," she whispered back. "When I came in, I found her tearing the place up. She's very upset Riku. We need to do something."

I looked from Kairi's pleading look to Selphie crying into Sora's arms. I sighed, not out of annoyance, but of fatigue since I knew this was not going to end well. I walked up to Selphie, kneeling down to gently touch her knee. The girl looked up from her perch in the crook of Sora's neck.

"Selphie, do you have any idea where you put the box?"

Selphie composed herself for a moment and then blew her nose on Sora's tie.

"I left it in this room. There's no way that it could be somewhere else—" She stopped herself from finishing her sentence as something in her mind clicked. I leaned back a bit, knowing that when the little hamster wheel in her head went into overdrive, I should run and duck for cover. But before I could flee with my pride intact, Selphie shot up from her chair, her face hard with anger, her jade eyes as dark as thick rain forest. She grabbed onto my tie and began dragging me out of the club room.

"H-hey! What's the matter!?" I shouted as my body was dragged onto the hallway.

"I think I know who took the box!"

My eyes widened. "Who?!"

"Maria."

"Maria?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

Selphie let me go at this instance, stopping in her tracks. I got up to straighten my clothes and fix my tie, waiting for her explanation.

"Well," she started, avoiding eye contact. This was never a good sigh since it meant that Selphie did something wrong and she practically _knew _it was wrong, but did it anyway.

"I kind of sort of showed off saying that we were going to blow the competition out of the water to put her in her place for not giving us a booth," she said rapidly. She winced when she saw my disappointed frown.

"Selphie! I thought you said this was going to be a secret performance?" I hissed. "What if Maria alerted the teachers or something?" I turned around, knowing that the performance was over if Maria already told on us.

"She wouldn't do that," she said, grabbing my wrist so that I wouldn't leave. "She wants nothing more than to see me crash and burn. So no, getting me in trouble with the teachers won't do anything to satisfy her blood lust!"

"Then you're over reacting," I said, snatching my wrist back. "Maybe you did forget the box somewhere. We should all just split up and look for it."

She shook her head. "No, I know she did it."

I rolled my eyes at her stubbornness. She grabbed my wrist again and we made our way back outside towards the club fair. It was already busy with students mingling about different booths seeing what the school clubs had to offer. After much pushing and shoving done on Selphie's part, we were able to make it to the student activities booth. Maria sat with her partner, handing out pamphlets and talking about the club in general. Selphie rushed up, pushing people out of her way to get to the front of the booth. I was the poor bastard trailing behind, apologizing for her rudeness while at the same time trying to communicate that I needed rescuing.

"Hand over the goods Maria!" Selphie wasted no time at getting to the heart of the issue.

The dark haired girl looked confused for a moment and stood up from her seat. She walked around the booth and pulled Selphie and I aside so that we didn't get more attention than we already had.

"What are you talking about?" she asked, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose.

"You know very well what I'm talking about," Selphie hissed. "You stole my box of outfits!"

Maria looked mortified as her jaw dropped. "I did not! I could careless what your stupid little club does!"

"Yeah right, where are they Maria!? Are you still bitter about what happened?"

Maria's face scrunched up with anger as she glared at Selphie. "You kissed my boyfriend!"

Selphie rolled her eyes. "That's ancient history, get over it."

"But he was my boyfriend!" Maria hissed.

"And you can do better!"

I just watched from the sidelines, seeing them go back and forth as I tried to loosen Selphie's grip on my wrist. I was debating on falling back onto my survival instincts and maybe try to gnaw my hand off.

"Face it!" Selphie shouted, which got the attention of not only Maria, but other students as well. "You just want to sabotage me! You knew that the show we were going to put on the roof was going to put this fair to shame."

My eyes widened as Maria looked at her and smirked.

"Oops," Selphie added as an afterthought. I pinched the bridge of my nose, annoyed.

"So you were planning something! I knew you were up to something when you came around to gloat, but I didn't expect you to plan something so stupid Selphie. I'm going to tell!"

Selphie's mouth dropped in shock. "You wouldn't!"

"Try and stop me!" Maria snapped back.

"Okay, okay, okay. What do you want?"

"Excuse me?"

"What do you want from me? I'll give you anything you want of mine as long as you don't tell."

Maria thought for a bit, curling one of her braids around a pale finger.

"Anything you say?" she asked raising an eyebrow.

"Well," Selphie thought for a bit. "Not everything. But I'm willing to part with some things."

Maria licked her lips and her eyes landed on me. I ceased my eternal struggle to pry Selphie's iron grip off my wrist as I could feel her eyes on me. My eyes widened in what could've been fear, but I tried to be smooth about it and just cleared my throat as I stood up straight.

"I get to kiss your boyfriend in exchange for you kissing mine."

"H-hey now--" I started, but Selphie wasted no time in pushing me into Maria's direction.

"Deal. Go on and sample the delights of his flavor."

"What?!" I snapped, outraged that she would sell me of all things. The only reply I got from Selphie was an eye roll.

"Oh, god, it's just a peck. You'll live."

"Yeah, but—"

My reasoning got cut off as Maria's lips landed on mine. I tried my best to keep the kiss chaste, but the girl had other plans in mind when I felt her tongue pry open my lips and plunge into my mouth. I felt my cheeks flair up as I tried to maneuver my way through this obvious rape of my mouth. Now, I'm no stranger to kissing, having stolen a few here and there. But making out with an audience there to gawk? I'm not accustomed to that and it only when Maria pulled away that I realized that I was holding my breath the entire time as my lungs burned for air.

I pulled back, feeling like a fish out of water, gulping for air. Maria didn't seem to have any trouble breathing. In fact, the girl licked her lips, grinning at me mischievously. I shivered. I don't _ever_ want to do that again.

"How do you like that?" Maria spat, looking at Selphie to see if the brunette was hurt over her actions.

"Ha! Jokes on you!" Selphie pointed. "He's not my boyfriend, he's my minion!"

Maria shrugged, ignoring my horror stricken face. "I don't care, I got what I wanted."

The raven haired girl went back to her booth while Selphie rolled her eyes.

"Come on!" Selphie snapped, grabbing my wrist. "The show must go on!"

My mouth opened and closed, trying to find words. "What?" I finally conjured. "How?"

She turned to look at me, a smile on her lips.

"You'll see!"

* * *

Why didn't I just try to gnaw my hand off when I had the chance? If I'd done that, I know I would've bled to death fleeing my captor instead of being on the roof of a seven story building dressed as a lion.

There's a reason why I'm dressed up as the wizard of Oz version of the cowardly lion. After Selphie and I, correction, after Selphie dragged my unwillingly form to follow her off the fair grounds, we went to the theatre department. She managed to black-mail the head of the department into giving us a box of costumes.

When we got back to the club room, she decided on her new theme, circus theme. After shoving a sputtering Sora, a blushing Kairi, and an angry me our new costumes, she dragged us up to the roof, which brings us up to now.

At the moment, Sora, in his clown costume, was helping Fran set up the DJ booth. Kairi, dressed as a magician's assistant was helping Selphie, who was dressed as a ring leader, put on her makeup. I was off to the side, in my lion costume, scowling and brooding.

It wasn't until later, when Selphie whipped me into consciousness that I knew we were starting the show. I scowled some more, annoyed that Selphie had a freaking whip.

"EVERYONE! MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE!?" Selphie shouted out of her megaphone.

The students on the ground all looked up.

Selphie smiled. "MY NAME IS SELPHIE TILMITT, AND I AM THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE! COME JOIN MY CLUB! WE'RE HERE TO NOT ONLY BRING SELPHIE AWARENESS TO THE WORLD, BUT ALSO MAKE PEOPLE'S WISHES COME TRUE!"

I looked over the edge a bit as more students crowded the ground.

"Selphie, do you still think this is a good idea?" I asked, worried that our performance wouldn't last very long if the teachers got wind of it.

"Of course it is Riku! This way, everyone can see our glory!"

"It would be awesome Selphie, if we weren't on the 7th floor," I replied, making my way back from the edge.

I cringed when I heard the crowd chanting.

"Jump! Jump! Jump! Jump! Jump!"

"Look they're chanting. They want us!"

I looked at Selphie in horror. The students wanted us to provided entertainment alright, with our bodies slamming into the ground at the speed of sound.

"Let's give them what they want!" Selphie cheered and gave Fran the signal to start the music. I tried pulling Selphie back as she walked over towards the edge, fearful that she might fall, but the brunette just brushed me off and started singing the lyrics to Britney Spears' Circus.

"I'm like the ring leader, I call the shots! I'm like a firecracker, I make it hot! When I put on a show!"

Looked behind me to see if Sora or Kairi would help me in getting Selphie out of here, but the duo were too busy dancing with each other and laughing to notice anything. Even Fran looked like she was having a good time as she manned the tables. I frowned. We were going to get in some deep trouble if we didn't clear this up. Already the student body is down them chanting us to jump. It won't be long before school officials get wind of this. I walked up towards Selphie, grabbing her wrist firmly.

"Selphie, we're going to get in trouble, let's go."

"There's only two types of guys out there," she sang, "Ones that can hang with me, and ones that are scared." She flicked the end of my nose and I scowled.

"So baby, I hope that you came prepared I run a tight ship!" Then she proceeded to whipped me. "So beware!"

"Stop whipping me!"

"I'm like the ring leader, I call the shots! I'm like a firecracker, I make it hot! When I put on a show!"

That must have been Fran's cue to set off the fireworks that were, unbeknownst to me, placed along the edges of the building. They started flickering and sparking, exploding into bright colors. The students on the ground cheered as Selphie continued to perform. I couldn't seem much due to the smoke of the fire works, but once I heard screaming and the smelled smoke, I knew something was wrong. The fireworks display was going haywire, some of them falling off and exploding along the way down. I looked around and gave Sora the signal to take Fran and Kairi to safety. I turned back around to see if I could see Selphie through the smoke. Sure enough the spunky brunette was still singing and dancing as if nothing wrong was happening at the moment.

"When I say Selphie! You say God! Selphie!"

"Selphie!" I snatched her from the edge and brought her towards the middle. "Everyone is running for their lives down there, I don't think they're into chanting right now."

"But!"

"Let's go!"

I quickly grabbed her, heading towards the exit. Little did I know that we had some company waiting for us in the form of police officers on the ground floor.

* * *

**note:** the lyrics to circus are obviously copy righted to britney spears and are not my own. I'm glad everyone is enjoying this. I'm hoping to stick to a bi-weekly schedule when it comes to updating, but school is being impossible at the moment. Anyway, thanks for reading!


	5. Chapter 5: Frienemies

**note: **This episode took forever to write, but here it is. Enjoy!

* * *

**Episode 5: Frienemies

* * *

  
**

It's been a week since the spectacular extravaganza literally blew up in our faces. We were immediately suspended from school for three days while they got our paper work settled with the police. The art building was closed down for roof repairs for a couple of days after the incident, then it was reopened yesterday to allow classes to continue.

No one was more devastated by these events than our parents. Sora and Kairi's parents were devastated because they were model students who now had serious blemishes on their squeaky clean records. Since Selphie's parents are rich, her father just wrote a check (he didn't seem to care as much as a normal parent should as he just shoved the check in the principal's hands while he yelled at his headset about stocks) My parents were not too happy about posting my bail. I'm pretty sure I'm grounded until I turn twenty-one. Fran's parents didn't show up, but her older sister, Jote, came instead. She didn't look too excited as she glared at Fran. Selphie was completely devastated, but for all the wrong reasons as the show most likely repelled rather than attracted new members. She said she would rather be thrown in prison than be striped of her creative rights to bring in members. I just raised a skeptical brow when she shouted this as her father dragged her hysterical behind away. I don't know about her, but being grounded and enduring all the suspensions and detentions sure beats doing twenty-five to life for reckless endangerment in jail.

Today was our last day of detention and besides the fact that we weren't allowed to talk to each other or leave the room unless it was to go to the bathroom (and even then we're escorted since Selphie tried unsuccessfully to escape by getting stuck in the girls' bathroom window), it seemed that everyone had mastered a routine to keep their sanity in check. Sora and Kairi did their work, Fran either read a book or knit, and Selphie usually sat in her seat with a look of such strong determination that sometimes it scared me. It made me wonder how fast that little hamster wheel was turning. As for me, I liked to stare out the window and watch the girls track team practice. What can I say? I like girls with short shorts.

I peeled my eyes away from the girls on the field stretching to look at the clock which read a quarter to four. This was the exact time our teacher and warden Mr. Kinney would leave to go on a 'bathroom' break which was code for 'I'm going to visit that cute teacher that I like next door in the hopes of getting laid'. We usually get about ten minutes of talk time before he got shot down and came back. Poor guy didn't seem to learn.

Anyway, Selphie always took this chance to sneak out of the room only to come back three minutes later with a sour pout and the information that our mail box for requests was empty.

Like clockwork, Mr. Kinney stood up from his desk and left the classroom, leaving the door ajar in case he heard a commotion when he returned. Selphie waited about a minute after his departure before she stood up from her desk, slamming her hands onto its surface.

"Emergency club meeting!"

Everyone looked up from what they were doing. Sora stared dumbly at her while Kairi looked surprised at Selphie's sudden outburst. Fran just stopped her knitting while my heated glare tried to melt Selphie's face off.

When it was apparent that no one was going to make an effort to move, Selphie grit her teeth.

"Now!" she growled. Everyone except for me scrambled out of their chairs to go to Selphie. I walked over to glare at her with my arms crossed over my chest. Who did she think she was ordering everyone around like this?

"We have a crisis here," she began, looking at our club members. "We haven't had any requests since our spectacular show went down!"

I rolled my eyes.

"Oh, you mean the one where we almost set the school on fire? How dare they forget," I drawled dryly.

My snark earned me a dirty look from Selphie, who chose not to retort. If I knew she wouldn't tackle me like a rapid chimp and rip my face off, I would've smile and pat myself on the back.

"Maybe the show was better off with a jazz theme? The circus outfits were a bit over the top and might have turned off potential members away," Sora said, trying to sound helpful.

So the fire crackers raining on the student body from the sky didn't scare them off?

I snorted down a chuckle, trying desperately not to laugh at my own awesome joke and failed when I let a giggle out. That earned me another fierce glare from Selphie, who looked just about to go ape shit on me. I cleared my throat and forced myself to look at the girls running outside. I was flirting with danger, I needed to stop.

Selphie placed her hands on her hips after turning her attention back to our group members.

"We need to change tactics again. Since our spectacular show ended in disaster, we need to do something that'll bring a positive light on the club."

"We're on probation Selphie," I finally spoke up. I didn't move my head to look at her, since I didn't need to see the annoyed look on her face. "Our club needs to lay low for a while."

"But how are we going to get our club moving if we don't at least try to get something to do. We can't just be here sitting idle," Selphie replied.

"Maybe we should try the bake sale idea," Kairi said, sensing the animosity in the air. Selphie surprisingly nodded, rubbing her chin as she considered the idea.

I saw Sora move away from the group from my peripheral vision. I turned my head from the window and caught a glimpse of the brunet sprint out of the classroom while the girls continued to discuss ideas. I was tempted to follow Sora out, curious as to what he was up too. But before I could take a step out of the classroom, the boy rushed in back into the classroom, holding our request box.

Everyone stopped their conversation as Sora placed the box on Selphie's desk. The brunet was a little out of breath as he panted. I frowned and decided right then and there that we were going to spar this weekend to get him back into shape.

Sora opened the box, where a single slip of paper lay. He pulled it out and began to read it to the group.

"The Student Council Committee needs help with their bake sale."

Everyone's eyes widen, even I looked surprised. Did the requester not see the fire crackers of death raining on them from the sky? How could they trust us with a bake sale after we were almost incarcerated?

Selphie was the first to react as she tackled Sora to the floor. The perky girl straddled him, sitting on his stomach as she took the slip from his hands and read the request with relish.

"YEEEEEESSSSSSS!" she practically screamed at the top of her lungs. Then she started to wiggle her hips and sing her version of the "Yes" song.

Sora looked like he was about to pass out from blood loss as Selphie didn't bother to move from her straddling position on top of him. Kairi was blushing fiercely, trying to look everywhere else but at the couple on the floor and Fran just blinked a lot. I didn't really have a reaction because I looked up in horror when the classroom door was violently pushed open. Suffice to say, we had a lot of explaining to do when Mr. Kinney walked in.

* * *

I didn't think he was going to go for it, but Mr. Kinney promised us not to tell anyone if we promised not to tell anyone about him putting the moves on the teacher next door. Now I understand what Selphie meant about black mail. Black mail was a beauty thing.

I made sure that Selphie and the girls were really far ahead of us when we were let out of detention. I grabbed Sora's wrist and pulled him aside. There was something about the request that irked me. After the whole extravaganza fiasco, would there really be someone insane enough to ask for our help?

"Sora," I stopped the brunet in his tracks. "About the request…"

"I did it," he replied without skipping a beat.

"What?"

He shrugged. "Well, they do need help."

I let go of the boy's wrist, freeing my hand to pinch the bridge of my nose in annoyance.

"Do they know that we're the ones helping?" I asked, trying to ignore the migraine forming within the walls of my skull.

"Nope," Sora chirped.

"You do know Maria and Selphie do not get along."

"I am aware," the brunet responded without a care in the world.

"Then why bring on the apocalypse?"

"This could be a chance for our club to redeem itself." Sora turned around to start walking and I followed. "Look, I realize that Maria and Selphie don't get along, but this is a chance for the girls to put away their differences and work together. Maybe at the end of this they'll be friends."

I gave him a skeptical look, raising an eyebrow while shaking my head.

"You're too optimistic for your own good," I said, snorting.

"And you're too pessimistic, Mr. tall, dark, and broody."

"No I'm not. I'm just realistic." I sighed. Because bringing these two girls together is the equivalent of bring the annihilation on the world, and by world, I mean me. "Sora, I understand that you want Selphie and Maria to put away their childish feud for the sake of this bake sale. But let's face it; putting these girls together in a room with confectionery treats just screams Armageddon."

Sora chuckled but I was serious.

"Nothing bad is going to happen," the brunet said with a click of his tongue and skip in his step. The boy was too happy for his own good.

* * *

"I thought you said nothing bad was going to happen!" I growled, scrubbing frosting off my neck. We immediately hit the showers since there was no salvaging our clothes. Sora laughed nervously as he shampooed his hair.

"Well, I didn't think it was going to be this bad?" he said, scrubbing his hair.

Let's back track here for a second here and let me explain why exactly we looked like walking pieces of Pillsbury dough boy.

It was Saturday after classes and the club was led to the home economics room where the student board of activities group was waiting for our help. Did I forget to mention that Sora completely forgot to inform the head, Maria that our club was going to help? Cue vicious cat fight between Selphie and Maria and Selphie's bat shit insane logic as to why she should rule the world with an iron fist.

We were all paired up with a person and assigned a specific treat to make. Sora and Kairi were paired up and they were in charge of chewy bars. I was paired up with Fran (more like, I snatched Fran away from some guy from the student board of activities as to avoid being partnered up with Selphie) and we were in charge of making lemon squares. Everyone else, sensing the murderous rage radiating from Maria and Selphie, tried their best to avoid the girls and partnered up with someone, leaving the two heads of the clubs with each other. Somehow I was starting to regret partnering up with Fran once I learned Selphie and Maria would be forced to work together. The girls were stationed behind Fran and I and I could hear them bickering on and on like an old married couple.

"That's too much salt!" I heard Selphie complain.

"What are you talking about? It says a teaspoon of salt!" Maria retorted.

I sighed and tried my best to concentrate on zesting the lemons while Fran measured the dry ingredients.

"Don't put that much flour! We're making cupcakes, not freaking bread!" Maria spat.

"We're making _a lot_ of them, therefore, we need _a lot _of flour," Selphie replied through gritted teeth.

I turned around at this point, wanting to curb their quarreling.

"Can you guys stop arguing and do your work?" I asked, annoyed.

The pair glared at me, their lips formed into tight angry pouts. I sighed and turned around, hoping that they would work quietly. And for a moment, it seemed that way. The room was busy with animate chatter and giggles here and there. Everyone seemed to be doing what they were supposed to be doing and having a good time while doing it.

"You're mixing it too hard! You'll over mix it!" I heard Maria shrill.

"Get off me!" Selphie growled.

I stopped juicing the lemons, my jaw tensing in annoyance. I turned around to give the girls another good talking to when my face became assaulted by all the batter they were fighting over. I stood there and the thick batter traveled down my face and onto my uniform. Both girls halted their fighting to stare at me and by the heavy silence in the room; I immediately figured they weren't the only ones staring at me in complete disbelief.

I calmly wiped the batter out of my eyes to see that both girls were blushing, only Selphie looked like she was trying so hard not to laugh. I glared at her. I turned my head to see if Fran got any of the batter and was surprised to see that the bunny girl was clean. Fran, the obvious Mary sue, brought a hand up and with a finger, swiped some of the batter mixture off my cheek. She brought it up to her mouth and tasted it (thus proving my theory that she indeed wanted me and that I was God's gift to women over the entire globe).

"FOOD FIGHT!"

I barely had time to duck when that war cry was roared across the room. Everyone broke out into a frenzy of throwing batter, frosting, and anything else they could get their hands on. I managed to get on all fours to crawl my way away from my station. I looked up in time to see Sora get a glob of frosting to the face. I winced. I went back to focus on my escape, crawling through the room, trying my best to not slip on the ingredient slippery floor. I felt a grip on my collar and my eyes widened in shock. _Please don't let it be Selphie, please don't let it be Selphie!_

"Where are you going pretty boy?"

I looked up to see a very cake battered Maria. She hauled me behind a random station, where we ducked for cover from the onslaught of ingredients being thrown about.

Maria peeked above from the counter. "Ha! I got your lover boy hostage! Give it up Selphie!"

"Never!" I heard Selphie war cry from across the room. "And he's not my boyfriend! He's my slave!"

"Same difference!"

I took this chance to crawl away, but was stopped all of a sudden by a hand on my ankle.

"Where are you going?" Maria growled. I tried to kick her away.

"Away from you!"

"But you're my meat shield!" she whined.

"Get away from me!" I yelled back.

"WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?"

Time seemed to stop at the sound of Mr. Hijikada's thunderous roar and I almost squeaked when the man looked down to me on the floor.

The room was dead silent as everyone looked at our Japanese history teacher in horror and awe.

"WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS?" he bellowed. I looked back to see everyone pointing a finger at Selphie and Selphie of course was pointing a finger at me.

"What?" I asked, indignant that Selphie would put the blame on me.

"Enough!" Mr. Hijikada roared.

I almost squeaked again. Well that shut me up.

"Everyone go get cleaned up!" Mr. Hijikada was turning red and I scrambled onto my feet to avoid his fear seeking gaze.

"You." He pointed to Selphie. "And you." He pointed to Maria. "Since you two are responsible for your groups you are going to cleaning everything up!"

Selphie and Maria groaned as the rest of the class filed up and left to get cleaned up.

* * *

After hitting the showers and getting dressed in our gym uniforms, I told Sora that he could go on ahead without me. I didn't know why I was doing this. Maybe I did feel a little sorry for Selphie for having to clean up the entire home economics room with her arch nemesis. Or maybe I just had a gut instinct that she would find me and force me to clean everything up anyway. Regardless of the twisted feeling at the pit of my stomach, I went and got a damp towel and made my way back to the home economics room.

I stopped short at the door when I heard the girls talking while they were cleaning up. I used my stealthy ninja skills to slide past the door and lean against the wall outside to hear their conversation while peeking inside.

"So…how's your boyfriend doing?" Selphie asked, starting conversation.

"He's fine," Maria replied, not making eye contact with the girl. "I broke up with him."

There was a shout silence as the girls continued to wipe the floor. Selphie threw her rag down on the floor and sighed.

"Look, I'm sorry for kissing him. He's not that bad of a guy since he resisted and all."

Maria shrugged. "He was a loser anyway and I'm totally over him."

Selphie nodded, picking up her rag and returning to her work.

"I've always wanted to ask you something," Maria said, breaking another short silence.

"Go ahead," Selphie said, not looking up from her work. "…Not like I can go anywhere."

"Why this club?"

Selphie paused before putting the rag in the bucket.

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Why did you make a club all about you?"

"It's not all about me," Selphie said, shaking her head.

"Like hell it isn't it."

"It's not!" Selphie retorted, sounding defensive. She put the rag in the bucket and pulled it back out, wringing it until her knuckles turned white. I frowned as I saw the girl wiping the floor rigorously.

"I just want to feel needed," Selphie whispered and she stopped wiping to look at Maria. "Like I want people to look up to me, you know?"

She resumed her cleaning, trying her best to stop her voice from cracking. "Everyone I know is cool in that way. Wakka is the captain of the blitz ball team, so his team mates already look up to him. Tidus' little sister is crazy about him. Kairi is super smart and everyone goes to her when they're having trouble with class work. And everyone loves Sora, the boy can kick puppies all day and everyone is behind him one hundred percent. When I look at them, I think, where does that leave me?"

Maria looked down at her rag, picking at it as she tried to think of something to say. I looked at Selphie, saw her vibrant green eyes take on a dark vulnerable look. It was a horrible look on her. Someone with her sunshine personality should never look that sad. Her lips were supposed to be stretched out into a beautiful smile; they weren't supposed to be drawn down into a pout. Her eyes were supposed to glitter with her signature mischievousness; they weren't supposed to dim with sadness and disappointment.

"I'm not super smart and I'm not popular," Selphie dropped her rag. "So what do I have?" she asked, looking at Maria.

"Riku."

"W-what?" Selphie stuttered, turning a bright shade of pink.

A raised a curious eyebrow as I saw Maria laugh.

"What I meant to say was," Maria began as she touched Selphie's hand. "You have your friends. I said Riku because well." She thought for a bit, chewing on her bottom lip. "The two of you seem close. Riku has always been seen as the unapproachable type. Thanks to you forcing him out of his shell, the school can look at Riku and see a guy they may want to hang out with." Maria straightened up a bit. "What I'm saying is that, you're the glue that holds all your friends together. You're the person that they go to for comfort, help, and support."

I had to agree with Maria there. Selphie was the shoulder Kairi cried on when she experienced her memories of Sora flooding back. She was the one that kept a positive outlook when Tidus' sister went missing. She always cheered on Wakka's team through all their wins and losses. And she was the first one to greet Sora, Kairi, and I back after our journey.

"It seems like the other way around to me," the brunet girl replied.

"Well, you're there for them right? I'm assuming they're going to be there for you too."

Selphie nodded, agreeing with the raven haired girl.

"I'm sorry for being so mean to you," Selphie said, grinning.

"Don't sweat it," Maria said, winking. "It takes two to tango right? I'm sorry too."

The girls put their rags into the bucket and looked around the room.

"Well, seems like we're done here. Let's go get cleaned up," Maria suggested.

I pulled back from peeking once I saw the girls standing up to leave the room. Maria left the room first and once Selphie was out I grabbed her wrist. She turned around, a smirk on her lips as she was surprised to see me. Maria looked at us and grinned.

"I'll go on ahead," she said, then winked at Selphie and walked down the hall.

I looked at Selphie, who was covered from head to toe in raw ingredients. I swallowed thickly as I stared into her big green eyes. There was something about her at the moment that was making my heart beat like crazy and making my throat swell, making it hard to talk. I opened my mouth and closed it several times, and berated myself in my head for looking like a fish gulping for water. Before the girl could open her mouth to ask what was wrong, I shoved the damp towel on her face, muffling any questions. I could feel my cheeks burn like coals as my mind tried quickly to think of a reason for me shoving a damp towel on her face.

"Get clean?" I heard my voice ask, and I seriously wanted the darkness to engulf me right then and there.

But Selphie didn't seem to detect my awkward behavior and if she did, she chose to ignore it as she just laughed and took the offered towel.

"Hey, can you give me a ride on your new bike?" she asked, cleaning up what she could of her face.

"No." I dead panned, gaining my cool persona back as I walked down the hall.

"Why not?" she whined, following.

"Because that requires for me to wait for you to shower and I want to go home already."

She pouted. "Don't be such a meanie! If you don't I'll flash you right now!"

I stopped dead in my tracks, a fierce blush burning on the surface of my cheeks. "W-what?"

Selphie rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, like you've never seen boobs before," she said, beginning to undo the buttons on her blouse. I immediately reached forward to stop her hands from going any further. My hands were shaking. There was a dark twisted part of me that resided in the deepest, coldest corner of the abysmal caverns in my mind that wanted to take her up on her offer, but I squashed that sick feeling.

"O-okay, I'll wait!"

The girl smiled, knowing that she won this battle.

"Good boy!" she chirped and grabbed my by the neck of my shirt. I sighed as I was being dragged against my will.

Looks like I'm back to being her slave.

I looked up from being dragged to see a bright smile on Selphie's face.

Yet, all seemed right and normal in the world.

* * *

Despite the moment of truce between Maria and Selphie, the girls were back to their old bickering ways once the bake sale started the next day.

It was funny to see both girls trying to out sell the other in pastries as they harassed boys into buying cupcakes. One guy couldn't decide who to buy from and was stuck in the middle. Both girls threatened bodily harm (with Selphie threatening to rip off his manhood while Maria threatened to smash it off) if he chose the other girl. Suffice to say, the boy ran away screaming in horror. I bought a cupcake myself and shared it with Fran.

"What the hell is this?" Maria asked examining one of the napkins used to give to the customers.

"My commission for helping you bake the cupcakes!" Selphie beamed, proudly.

"I never agreed to advertise your club on the napkins!" Maria roared.

Selphie laughed. "Oh well! Too bad!"

I sighed, hearing them bicker again and gave my half of my cup cake to Fran, who didn't seem to mind.


End file.
